Okay, I have a lot to say and I'm not so sure if I should say it all. Well, first of all...YEAH for Bluemoon82!!! For once someone who can try to get her point across to Kaylar from a Lawyer perspective, but still agree with me! I totally agree with the fact that you shouldn't "sugarcoat" or lie about things to people, especially if you are their lawyer. That is beside the point at this moment. First, you aren't MY lawyer, and I did/do want honest advice, but at least learn to phrase it a little better. I also understand that being a lawyer is a lot of work and after a while you prob. see so many cases like this or like other things ex. abuse, theft, drugs,ect. that you are trying to defend, but you get desensitized to it since after a lot of that they prob. all "look" the same to you. That is something that is prob. bound to happen, like in any job, but I really think it is in the way you present yourself that makes all the difference. Like Bluemoon said, you can still try to "empathize" with someone without lying to them, showing a little sympathy doesn't make you a bad lawyer and doesn't mean you aren't telling them the whole truth either, it can just be done with more "tact." It is just like a really great doctor with the worst BEDSIDE Mannor on the planet!! Just because you are telling someone that they only have like 24 hours to live doesn't mean that you have to come in the room and be like "WEll, tough luck man, sucks to be you cause you'll be luck to get like a day or so more, better live it up while ya can -hole!" Instead you could say "I'm so sorry Mr. Jones but unfortunately your cancer has spread and you prob. only have a few days left. I'll leave you alone with your family and if there is anything I can do please let me know." You could be the best dr. in the world, but if you have a horrible bedside mannor nobody will like you and want to be your patient. Making people's lives worse by being insensitive, or making it sound like they did it to themselves and they deserve it is NOT okay by any means! It would be like you saying "Oops, Mr. Smith sorry you were so stupid and didn't use protection while having sex, or using drugs and now you have AIDS! Ha ha! YOu should have known better and not been so dumb! Too bad for you! Tough luck, enjoy your few months/years left!" You act like what I did by having an affair with a married man makes me deserve this horrible ending! Kaylar, like in your last paragraph you say that "Any intelligent woman would run" is saying that I am uninitelligent and basically that I "got what was coming to me". Thanks a lot for making me feel like an even bigger piece of than I already do Kaylar! You may be a good lawyer, but I'm glad you aren't mine. I don't mean to get hostile or mean, but I already feel like I have been disgarded like yesterday's newspaper and thrown in the trash by someone I fully trusted and believed in more than anything! My whole life has been flipped upside down and has been shaken to the core! I don't even know if anything in the last few years were real or lies or both, I don't believe ANYONE anymore and you are making it sound like I just should have known better and not got involved in the first place. It is a little too late for that and telling me I am stupid does nothing to help, that is not just being honest of not sugarcoating it it is just plain mean. I am trying my best to make it through each and every day and take care of my daughter even though her dad isn't here. I love that little girl more than life itself and no matter what happens with her dad and myself I will do anything to make sure she knows that she is loved by me and her sisters and that I will always be here for her! If he screws us out of money, assets, a life knowing/being with him, ect. I guess I have no choice in the matter, it is all in his hands right now. I have to take it as it comes, I have done my part to try and do what I have to do for her sake like the DNA test, filing papers, ect. I will continue to fight for our well-being and if that isn't what I should be doing than I don't know what to do. I am trying my best and hoping for the best no matter what that ends up being. Only time will tell and I can't fix the fact that he has part of our future in his hands and his alone. I don't care if you think I am dillusional about thinking that just maybe...a little shred of hope says he could come back after the DNA test comes back and she gets mad. Part of me doesn't want him back, I am torn and the wounds are fresh, it has been over a month, but it would have been our 3 year anniversary on Sun. (2 days ago). It is hard not to think about things. I can't think about how the last 3 years of my life could have been all lies, I don't think I could ever trust anybody again, even myself, I need to keep my head up for as long as possible so I don't crash! I am a woman and a mother and that means that I CAN"T just run away or pretend my children don't exist, and I woudn't even if I could, but I need to be here for them and keeping a shred of hope that keeps me sane is all I have left. Thanks to Tinkerbell and Bluemoon and others for your support and I'm sorry if I just frustrate you Kaylar because I am just a stupid, typical mistress living a lie and paying the price for it but being in denial. I can't help the past and I can only hope the future gets better. I am just trying to survive. This is all I know how to do right now. Sorry if that isn't good enough.