KC, you are very fortunate to have such an ideal environment growing up. It is your advantage then that you had this much love as you described that made you confident and caring as well. Women, in nature though are by instinct motherly and are bound to "fix" a man that they care about, which could lead to a very unhealthy situation for both partners. You need to stick a proper balance - easier said than done!
You mentioned that your bf has abandonment issues growing up...you ALREADY knew it! Why are you repeating it? Why are you reinforcing the fear and insecurity that he has had since childhood? By breaking up everytime you feel like it, and after a few breaths, taking him back, you are repeatedly wounding his already wounded inner child. You have to think here for both of you. Recomsider. What is it that you really want? Do you love him that much? Are you willing to put up with his issues?
No man is altogether THERE - perfect - If you find one, tell me - I want that man! We all have our issues and ghosts to deal with. All it takes is the will and the heard to either deal with it apart or together. Now, you must understand also that you cannot change him. It has to come from him. He must have the initiative to "grow" and better himself. I advise for you to take a "cool off" time apart - temporarily, just to think things over. Agree on when to meet again and talk about your realizations about what you both want in life, where you are at emotionally, how you would be working things/issues through and why you are going through these things.
Relationships should be such that would help make a person better and better and not cloud the persons involved with more and more baggages that clutter their entire being.
Goodluck and take care of yourself first and foremost.
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