If you feel you've lost your independance, then that can tip you over the edge. He needs to understand what a recovering alcoholic needs in terms of encouragement, support and trust..
You should get him to consider reading a book in this regard if you can't talk logic into him.
Corey is right, your not a child, he's not your parent.
But, the way your describing this, it sounds either 1) recent and only over the past couple of years, or 2) happened 13 years ago, thereabouts and he's been like this all the way through.
I know that with addictions we dislike the people that are ensuring we keep the habit licked, so has it actually been that long?
A little more information can help I think in giving you answers as you can tell, the posters above have simular questions and thoughts.
Welcome to the Forum and good for you to not only stop but also to write about it and open up and talk.
We're good listeners, supporters and our "opinions" aren't bad either
CW