Women's Health Support Forums - View Single Post - Problems with Orgasums, It doesn't turn him on...

saturn71188 · 10-26-2009, 02:40 AM

I recently started a relationship with a good friend i've known for 7 years, things are going good, but i find myself really hurt and upset about some issues we have had with our sex life. Things started off good, but i guess i got boring or something. About 4 months into the relationship I found a lot of porn on his computer, and he was signed up for sites to meet other girls to have sex with. He also had been looking at personal ad's on craigs list. To be fair from what I know he never talked to any girls just tried to, So I of course freaked out. He wanted to be with me for so long and made me think I was really what he wanted... so i thought things over for hours at work and wrote out a list of questions for him to answer " why did you do this? What did you feel?" Am I good enough?" Do I give you a rush anymore" ect... i wrote a lot and when we talked later on he answered almost all my questions with out me having to ask them, and said he was really sorry and he messed up, Pretty much everything I wanted to hear. I guess I knew I wouldn't end things over this, but part of me wanted to. I could understand if your with someone for a long time and you try to cheat or cheat on them, but only 4 months with the girl you apparently wanted for 7 years.

Now I've tried to put it out of my mind, but I still have in the back of my head that i'm not hot enough or exciting enough and I want to desire sex more and be more into it, but I cant orgasum through intercourse. I've told him this and he said that making me orgasum during intercourse is what really turns him on. Am I being selfish but isn't it supposed to be about what turns me on? hes going to have one no matter what. I have suggested using a vibrator and asked him to try focusing more on the clit but i feel like i'm not getting through... when he tried a few times to make me orgasum by clit it didn't work... it was taking so long that i just gave up, i felt bad that it was taking so much time, and thats probably why it didn't happen in the first place. I just want to enjoy the sex we have because I love him and everything else is great. Any tips?
Thanks
sorry for the bad spelling and grammer... its 5am... i'm so tired.

10-26-2009, 02:40 AM	#1
saturn71188 Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 1	Problems with Orgasums, It doesn't turn him on... I recently started a relationship with a good friend i've known for 7 years, things are going good, but i find myself really hurt and upset about some issues we have had with our sex life. Things started off good, but i guess i got boring or something. About 4 months into the relationship I found a lot of porn on his computer, and he was signed up for sites to meet other girls to have sex with. He also had been looking at personal ad's on craigs list. To be fair from what I know he never talked to any girls just tried to, So I of course freaked out. He wanted to be with me for so long and made me think I was really what he wanted... so i thought things over for hours at work and wrote out a list of questions for him to answer " why did you do this? What did you feel?" Am I good enough?" Do I give you a rush anymore" ect... i wrote a lot and when we talked later on he answered almost all my questions with out me having to ask them, and said he was really sorry and he messed up, Pretty much everything I wanted to hear. I guess I knew I wouldn't end things over this, but part of me wanted to. I could understand if your with someone for a long time and you try to cheat or cheat on them, but only 4 months with the girl you apparently wanted for 7 years. Now I've tried to put it out of my mind, but I still have in the back of my head that i'm not hot enough or exciting enough and I want to desire sex more and be more into it, but I cant orgasum through intercourse. I've told him this and he said that making me orgasum during intercourse is what really turns him on. Am I being selfish but isn't it supposed to be about what turns me on? hes going to have one no matter what. I have suggested using a vibrator and asked him to try focusing more on the clit but i feel like i'm not getting through... when he tried a few times to make me orgasum by clit it didn't work... it was taking so long that i just gave up, i felt bad that it was taking so much time, and thats probably why it didn't happen in the first place. I just want to enjoy the sex we have because I love him and everything else is great. Any tips? Thanks sorry for the bad spelling and grammer... its 5am... i'm so tired.