Women's Health Support Forums - View Single Post - He reveals a secret.....a genetic disorder.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 10-26-2009, 10:27 AM

I've been dating him for around 4 months. What a wonderful sweet soul he is. But he has issues, like the rest of us.....but unlike myself he has ignored his, refusing to admit them or deal with them and every now and again one of them rears its ugly head. Before dating we were friends for about 6 months. When my aunt passed away with cancer, and I brought up my dad passing, he mentioned his mom also passing in 2006. He didn't say what from.

For the last 4 months, and the 6 mths before that, he has never again mentioned his mother, their previous relationship, his childhood, her death, etc. I talk about my dad alot, so I try to open up the door for him to discuss what happened, but he never does. I feel that I shouldn't ask him, or pry.....because if he wanted to tell me he would. At the same time though, I find it odd that he wants such a serious relationship with me, sees a future with me, says I'm basically his best friend..........yet hides a huge part of his life from me. Another thing is that when I bring up my dad, he says nothing......as if I've not even spoken...which of course is hurtful to me.

So last night we had some words which turned into a long discussion of these hidden issues. He acknowledged that he has things he needs to open up about. I brought up his mother....the fact that he has never mentioned not even a word of her or her death to me which resulted in him telling me that she suffered for 7 years and eventually died from Huntingtons Disease.

This morning, I research it. I see that parents who have this genetic disorder will pass on a 50% chance to their offspring of having it. For those of you that do not know anything about the disease, google it.

Instantly I feel somewhat betrayed. Yes, it's only been 4 mths but we've spoken of a possible future together. Has he been tested for this gene? I have no idea and didn't know to even ask that when he told me last night. And he's been so withholding about his past, I feel very uncomfortable asking him.

So I guess I'm writing because I want to know how you all would feel if this was your situation? What would you do?

10-26-2009, 10:27 AM	#1
Beautiful Disaster Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: United States - Kentucky Posts: 461	He reveals a secret.....a genetic disorder. I've been dating him for around 4 months. What a wonderful sweet soul he is. But he has issues, like the rest of us.....but unlike myself he has ignored his, refusing to admit them or deal with them and every now and again one of them rears its ugly head. Before dating we were friends for about 6 months. When my aunt passed away with cancer, and I brought up my dad passing, he mentioned his mom also passing in 2006. He didn't say what from. For the last 4 months, and the 6 mths before that, he has never again mentioned his mother, their previous relationship, his childhood, her death, etc. I talk about my dad alot, so I try to open up the door for him to discuss what happened, but he never does. I feel that I shouldn't ask him, or pry.....because if he wanted to tell me he would. At the same time though, I find it odd that he wants such a serious relationship with me, sees a future with me, says I'm basically his best friend..........yet hides a huge part of his life from me. Another thing is that when I bring up my dad, he says nothing......as if I've not even spoken...which of course is hurtful to me. So last night we had some words which turned into a long discussion of these hidden issues. He acknowledged that he has things he needs to open up about. I brought up his mother....the fact that he has never mentioned not even a word of her or her death to me which resulted in him telling me that she suffered for 7 years and eventually died from Huntingtons Disease. This morning, I research it. I see that parents who have this genetic disorder will pass on a 50% chance to their offspring of having it. For those of you that do not know anything about the disease, google it. Instantly I feel somewhat betrayed. Yes, it's only been 4 mths but we've spoken of a possible future together. Has he been tested for this gene? I have no idea and didn't know to even ask that when he told me last night. And he's been so withholding about his past, I feel very uncomfortable asking him. So I guess I'm writing because I want to know how you all would feel if this was your situation? What would you do?