Hold the fire there, guys.

rcorey - I agree with you. I am very happily married. No one I could possibly meet could understand me as my husband does, nothing that could happen between me and another person could compare with what my husband and I have been through in the eight years of our marriage. But what if one specific thing wasn't being met? I'm trying to think of comparisons but I can't find anything as big as sex. Which is why I was here in the first place. Dilemma, dilemma.

Rav - you were so right on with your "sex doesn't equal love" post. Very simply stated, and right on the nose. But then I think, so how are you showing you love someone when you won't touch them for your own reasons, and knowing they need it and want it, still won't do it? Again, dilemma.

Photog, I don't even need to see you to know that there's no chance... if something were to happen on my end, it would have to be a very specific situation. I didn't post a personal ad, it was a need for advice.

Secondly, you even said in your post that you get plenty of vaginal sex! Why in the world would I want to meet a man who's either just looking for oral or coolie sex - or a guy who just feels he isn't getting the "right kind" of sex?? Boo freakin' hoo!

Third, but actually first, your language was a total turn-off.

My hubby and I have been discussing the sex thing a lot lately... and he's ready to get back on the bike. I'm not sure how it will go and I'm afraid of the pressure he's putting on himself - if it doesn't go well, that doesn't bode well for the future, I know. So I'll just keep my fingers crossed.