03-31-2008, 06:14 PM
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Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Sunny shores of New Jersey
Posts: 7
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It will all work out:)
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Dear Confused,
It will all work out, believe me. I had my hysterectomy at age 29 (am 51) now.
I firmly believe what my Mom told me at the time as I too worried about the changes it would cause me. She told me "Honey, change is only all that you make it. If you expect the worst then the worst will happen. If you go into it with a positive mind set it will make all go easier for you." She also said that she believed that change of life is different for each person depending upon their state of mind prior to it occurring. For example, my Sis is a high strung nervous little thing and she expected her to have a more difficult time than myself as I was more laid back.
No, the hot flushes are definitely not fun but they will pass and become less and less and less intense as time goes by. Sweater on , sweater off will be common for some time and you may experience night sweats where you actually appear to have stepped out of a very hot shower. Keep a fan near your bedside and tell your honey to just keep a blanket near for himself but the fan goes on if you get overwhelmed.
I took hormone therapy for only a few months then stopped as there are too many bad side effects including higher risk of breast cancer and I have a family history for it so why play roulette was my thinking. I just mustered through without. Herbs work for some but not always. I think it all comes down to just keeping a positive train of thought that this is a passage each woman must take at some point in her life. A passage not all together pleasant for sure but stay strong and you will come out fine in the end.
As far as the loss of sexual interest, you can ask your doctor for something to peak that interest. I wouldn't take just anything off the market without consulting your doctor. He or she will know what is best for you. Even so, that interest too will return, it's just the discomfort of the symptoms that consume your mind and body that doesn't allow you to feel "interested". Hopefully, he is an understanding partner and will allow you the time for your body to adjust to something that rather than happening at a normal age in life was brought on to you at a time in your life when it wasn't suppose to. If he doesn't understand than that's not uncommon, men seem to think that we have some "button" we can press to become the "old me" and sorry, it doesn't work like that. Get him a book about Menopause and tell him that in order to understand you that he needs to read it because Menopause is a very "real" condition and one that effects everyone around us. With better understanding, he will better know how he can be of help to you.
Your body normally decides when that time comes and works itself up to it but when it is surgical for some other reason at a younger point in your life, well sadly to say, your body wasn't ready and so revolts at the suddeness. It doesn't like having choices made for it when our bodies work on a time table to some extent just as aging for example.
Relax and try very hard not to work against your body as this only adds to the problems at hand and intensifies your flushes and anxiety. A good idea would be to maybe take a yoga class or better yet Tai Chi as they help you to gain control of stress and work on inner peace and that is exactly what your body needs. Tai Chi with meditation works well for the spirit and once you relax, all around you will come into place.
I hope this helps and my heart goes out to you, I know how hard it all seems right now but you will be ok. Accept the change and don't worry about what use to be, you are still that woman and it all is still there. It's just a puzzle that's been tossed about but the pieces will all come together.
Hugs and Good Luck to You,
Juniee
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