I absolutely enjoy reading other person's writing! If only I had the patience to do so. So, far, so good! One thing I have found is that you must must must be descriptive. You may see things clearly, as you remember them, in your head, but you have to draw a picture with words for your readers, so they can understand it better. After every two chapters, or so, go back through, re-read what you've written, and re-write it, ellaborating on more things. You'd be surprised that a ten page chapter can easily become a twenty page chapter if you do so.

I have a close friend of mine who is also writing a novel based loosely on his hard childhood. He emails me weekly and I revise and critic. You're more than welcome to do the same. If you're interested just send me a private message and I'll send you my email address.