most people define "cheating" as a sexual affair - involving intercourse.

you really have to determine what your perspective is on cheating. if it's the above, then - obviously, watching strippers isn't cheating.

what is the spirit of your marriage vows? probably there wasn't an explicit statement that you promise not to look at strippers.

but i would argue that, regardless of how they're worded exactly, the intent of words like "honor," "cherish," & "love" describe a lifelong relationship in which both partners would turn their romantic passion & sexual attention on one another exclusively.

biology will dictate that we cannot help but notice the opposite sex - especially the way its flaunted before us today. but the purposeful & willing choice to pick one person to love & honor forever dictates that - when we notice the opposite sex - we fight any urge to pursue that.

i just can't reconcile how i'm honoring my wife when i go to a strip club & bathe other women's naked bodies with my eyes, celebrating their beauty. how am i cherishing my hunger for her when i'm going out with the intent to hunger for someone else?

is it cheating? not in the traditional sense. but is it dishonoring the sanctity of my relationship with my wife? absolutely.

there is an intimacy that the 2 of us should share - and only the 2 of us. that intimacy should be more than just rubbing body parts. it should be a path that runs between us where all of our sexuality & desire flows out to one another - and it should be off limits to anyone else.

maybe i can't help but look at the hot young thong on the beach. i can help staring though. i can't do much about the 1st look - i can do everything about the 2nd one though. it's not any more fun that saying no to a 3rd beer when i have to drive.

but it's entirely possible.

and the only responsible thing to do.