01-22-2007, 04:40 PM
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Guest
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B & H epiloge
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In some relationships the venture into infidelity
can not be borne by one party. There is no way
to wrap the mind around the betrayal.
In others, the offended party forgives the adultery.
In a few cases, the marriage continues, just as good
as or better than it was before.
In many cases, the forgiven takes this as a carte blanche,
the mistake is not being unfaithful, it is being caught.
Firstly; saying...."How could you do this to me?"
suggests that you existed in his mind when he opened
his zipper.
Secondly; thinking...."What did I do wrong?"
is taking 'guilt' or 'responsibility' for an action
as related to you as the Kendal Crash, (if you
don't know what that is, the analogy works even
better).
Forgiving the adultery makes you available for
more adultery.
Bill was not in love with Monica. She was an available
pair of lips. If she wasn't available, then it would be
someone else. But to think that Monica qua Monica
had any importance whatsoever is to miss the true
nature of this kind of serial adultery.
And asking...
"Why does H put up with it?" or
"How can she stay married to B?"
Misses the point.
The point being; the management of adultery.
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