Becoming Independent

I have been thinking lately at how my life had turned out. I have been broken a couple of time, on different occasions, with various reasons and situations.

Professionally, I've encountered put downs on a day-to-day basis. I strived hard to enhance my crude skills, for I knew I have the potential all along. On relationships, whether it be platonic or romantic, I have always found myself on the giving end. Why couldn't I take as much as I gave? Was it because how I was raised: it is ...

I know...I am a blackbelt in WH Blogging...

This is the way to supplement my self-talk, before I grow totally insane from being by myself.

I don't want to be overbearing to anyone, so whatever I feel and think, I write them down here. This has been my sanctuary in any season of my life. So, welcome to my world...may you find my life amazingly crazy yet worthwhile.

09/12/09

I broke my first board in Tae kwon do in just one kick (step side kick). ...

I was in turmoil a while ago,
Yes, I did an abomination.
A certain deed,
Not typical of me.
A certain act that is off the wall
Mainly illogical and unacceptable.

I battled deep within.
I wrestled against my will,
My mind stopped thinking,
My heart clamored of not beating
At all.

Yet, after pondering
Listening to insightful words
These loving people gave,
I realized it's OK.

Though my moral ...

I thought I CAN manage
I did for a while
But my spirit is low
and not in-sync.

I did something last night
That surely would break your heart
I did it, because I hate you
I hate ME.

I no longer want to live,
I want to sleep endlessly
Never to wake up.

I feel so empty
I feel all alone
I don't have anybody
To turn to but myself.

I wanted to be patient
I wanted to be caring ...

Monday - Sweet Adelines International (Wichita Chorus) - 7:30pm- 10:00pm

Tuesday - Taekwando - 7:30pm - 8:30pm

Wednesday - Centergy (Yoga and Pilates combined - advanced class) - 6:30pm - 7:30pm

Thursday - Taekwando - 7:30pm - 8:30pm

Friday - Weight lifting/Gym workout

Saturday - Centergy (Yoga and Pilates combined - advanced class) - 10:30am - 11:30am

Sunday - walk in the park, or just be lazy