I have been in this mood since last night. I tried to fight it, but to no avail. I hate it when this episode comes. I wish I can just teleport myself to wherever I want to go.

On the second thought, if I could, where would I go?

To Disneyland where all my dreams come true? well, probably my kiddie dreams - but once I get back home, I realize it's just a fantasy after all.

To SeaWorld? Maybe a good choice for a water person like me. But then, I don't get to...

I am having this emotional roller coaster,
It could be hormonally induced,
Stress related
Or schizophrenic in nature!

Whatever it is, I feel it
Coming and going
Like waves that wash the shore
Like the tides that would go high or low,

Dependent on the moon's gravity
So does my emotions...
Am I really this crazy?

I drove home yesterday
With a very happy
Content heart.
Knowing that my love is here...

Well, I have been doing a lot of self-talk today.

I had lunch at PF Chang's as I used to - on my own! I have to do this in order to get out of my domain...But when I drove home, I was nauseous, up to this very moment. I feel lke throwing up....argh!

Oh, I wish I can share this moment with ... (whatever)...venting, venting, venting! This is tough...but I will make it!

I feel weak, can't eat what I want...Always feel like I will throw up...Hand me the sweets,...

Sept. 7, 09

I am having abdominal pain on the left side. I am boxing some of my items for the great move...

It comes and goes, for about 5 min. interval.
If there is something that I really worry about is that this might be an ectopic pregnancy and my fallopian tube burst - that I will die.

Oh, well...at least I know, I have loved fully all my life!

To everyone, I take a final bow! lol!

P.S.

I have been meeting with...

I pray to God to make me strong,
Fill me with His love when things go wrong.
When you are down,
You can hold on,
To me as a friend, your very own.

I pray to God that He'll guide us,
As we begin a new journey
Away from each other
Yet close at heart.
In spirit we are one,
No matter what
The circumstances are.

I pray that He will see us through,
Provide us all what we need, to do
His will...abide in...