sweetpea85

Here's the run-down:

Day 9: intercourse w/o condom
Days 10, 11: creamy/eggwhite discharge...no intercourse
Day 12: definitely eggwhite discharge...intercourse w/o condom (oops) early AM

I use Fertility Friend to plot when I ovulate, and it shows I definitely did on day 12. My husband wears a condom 99% of the time. Right after my period, we usually have a condom-free day or two...but on day 12, he'd had a few beers and didn't stop to put one on.

I'm only on day 19 of my cycle. I have about a week until FF recommends I take a test. I've obviously been paranoid about every little thing, thinking it could be an early symptom. Generally, my energy has been low and I've been needing to take naps mid-way through the day. My breasts have been hurting on-and-off. I feel/look bloated. I've been losing weight recently, and now it looks like I'm gaining it back. I usually feel bloated right after I ovulate. Though the breasts hurting usually doesn't happen until right before my period.

I know I'm not going to know if I'm pregnant or not until I take a test. I know any of the symptoms I may feel could be explained by my cycle anyway. It's just going to be really hard waiting to take that test...waiting to know. And I'm scared again that I might be really depressed if I get a negative result. Though we're not planning on TTC until late summer/early fall, I really would be happy if we conceived right now...as "inconvenient" as that would be for my job.

I've been daydreaming about being pregnant...telling people we are...buying things for the baby. That's SO dangerous for me. Last time I did that and got a negative pregnancy test, I sobbed for a good 20 minutes. But I don't know how to not think about it.

Thinking about it, of course, is only making this worse and making time go by slower. It's going to be a long week.