WC's Must Read Book for 2011

**WildChild** · 06-25-2011 03:06 PM

Last year I had one in January and I still recommend that you ALL read, Women Lead the Way.

I read quite a bit and so many of the books are ones I would like to share with a certain person or group of people, but for this I look for one I think EVERYONE should read. This is not a new book, it was a bestseller some years ago, Oprah recommended that every woman read it. I had read other books by this author and found them excellent but this ONE should be read by ALL of you.

There is NO doubt in my mind that lives will be changed or saved by reading this book. No Doubt. I wish it had been out and available to me years ago when I was dealing with a potentially deadly stalker. (Actually the police who advised me to become invisible said it wasn't a matter of of if but of when.)

There were sections of this book that spoke to things I have dealt with, so strongly that I was in tears at finally having someone who was in a position to know, giving me validity. I have explained over and over to various people, that women and men live in different worlds, that women at some level, live in fear of their lives virtually all their lives. That fear is of and from our interactions with men. Some men, lighter weight, gay men for example, may understand this, men who have been bullied persistently may understand it, by an large, it is not part of the male experience.

This is not a bash anyone book, it is not a live in fear book - it is actually the opposite. It is a book about learning to use your native, instinctual intuition and fear, to know when and what you should look out for and how to avoid situations of personal danger by doing so. Author Gavin De Becker explains how anxiety and groundless fears undermine our ability to recognize true threats and how we are taught to ignore the real warnings out mind and body give us. He discusses the role of media and what drives many dangerous people. He talks about how we can live feeling and being more comfortable with the world and people around us because we are able to distinguish the real threats from the imaginary.

Gavin De Becker is a personal safety expert, his firm's clients include government agencies, well known public figures, top Hollywood stars, large corporations and ordinary people who are at risk. Coming from a background of family violence he addresses all aspects of ways one human is a threat to another. With this book you will learn what is worth you attention and why you need to let go of manufactured anxiety and worry.

This is a very readable book. There are some fascinating true crime stories and little known behind the scenes information about some well known crimes. This a MUST read.

THE GIFT OF FEAR AND OTHER SURVIVAL SIGNALS THAT PROTECT US FROM VIOLENCE
by Gavin DeBecker.

**Mes T** · 06-25-2011 06:39 PM

And written by a man, too? Very impressive.

I'll pick up a copy asap and post my opinions here when I finish it.

There's something about men who can see life from a woman's perspective that is very touching to me. For example here in New Zealand we've had a very sad man (Chief Executive Officer of the Employers & Manufacturers Association, actually - so the guy IN CHARGE of workforce, money, that sort of thing) say that women got paid less than men because they had their periods.

Honestly. That's what he said. Women got paid less than men because they had their periods and consequently were less productive. (Of course he didn't bother compiling evidence, ignored the fact that on average men actually took more sick leave than women, no that wasn't relevant to him).

Anyway you can imagine the outrage this has caused, and I've been very proud of NZ because it looks like just as many men have been affected by this as women.

In fact there was a protest this weekend, where among everything else TAMPONS were thrown at the building where this guy works. And that protest? Led by a MAN.

My boyfriend doesn't understand why this makes me feel very... hopeful.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 06-30-2011 05:25 PM

Just hearing you talk about it makes me want to read it. Why? Because when I read something and know it will change lives, I want SO badly for everyone to read it. I want them to learn what I learned, etc. You said it's life changing...... and that's exciting to me.