As many of you, I read through the dating forum and without a doubt, I read about someone who is in a particularly painful situation. I read about people who are in positions where they don't know what to do...many times they know what they "should" do, but can't find the courage to do it without some back-up from friends on this site.

Sometimes the poster is doing "the right thing" in the wrong circumstances, and sometimes the poster is doing "the wrong thing" in the right circumstances. Having dated a LOT in my younger days, I can tell you that there are few situations I can't empathise with. Many of the situations that are brought up are situations I have experienced MYSELF (either directly through my own relationships or indirectly through the relationships of my friends/family!

I guess the point I am trying to make here is that sometimes when people are in a relationship and there are a lot of unknowns, it's easy to feel like you're all alone and no one has ever been in a situation exactly like yours (heck, YOU'VE never been in a situation like this before...right?). Well rest easy folks, because many of us older folks in here have been in situations EXACTLY like yours. You are not alone!

You're coming to the right place here. These people on this site (women and men) have experience that can help you!

Cheers.

thank you! It's exactly what I needed to hear and why I've started posting here

Ant

Actually Fire(m), when I joined it was because it said "Women's Health" and so I had a question.

But Marriage/Fiancee - Dating - Relationships were the main threads popping up over and over and i probably reached 500 posts in one month, no word of lie, ask the Administrator...

I agree with you, we are seen, exprienced or know of someone, in such similar circumstances or have hindsight as to what is going on and it's a fantastic place to ban together to provide same.

I hope your heading, when googled brings people over here with such questions.

I think you already know that many people here may answers various threads, but at some stage pose questions about themselves, me included, knowing that answers will come through to contemplate.

Good thread, from the heart as usual with you.

CW

thanks its true. and it def does help having feedback from people who have "been there,done that".

Fire(m), you said it in a few short words. We are all here or went through it and one reason in the unknown. It "IS" unknown when someone just drops you and doesnt explain. it "IS" painful to lose who you love. and the list can go on & on.
Your head has things running through it so fast trying to make sence but you only get confused more and more b/c you don't want the worst to be true.
You don't want to hear all the negative friends and family say. you don't want to think you were dumped for someone else. What was the real reason? You ask all the time for a long time. But the fact remains it doesn't matter b/c that person left you and didn't tell you, leaving you in the dark to wonder why, how you got here and what the happened to something that was or seemed to be going very well.
You didn't argue, fight, cheat, lie, abuse, neglect, insult............. nothing you did was wrong but yet, they left you like someone tossing trash out the window of a moving car. Making you feel low, taking your confidence, self-esteam, knocking you down to ground so that a frog can easily hop over you.
Does it suck, YES it does.
But what breaks us can also make us. What knocks us down will make us stand taller. For every thing you felt negatively about should be turned into possotive things and the sun will shine on you brighter than it ever did.
And then their is karma. Karma does exist. Believe it or not but it does. I can give you so many examples but each one is different. But I am a firm believer that what comes around goes around. Eye for an EYE, Tooth for a Tooth as it says in the bible. For what someone did to you, God didn't forget but it will take a little while for him to answer as he has so many to get his revenge that you "ARE NOT ALONE" and it will take awhile to catch up.

JWB

I also think that it is "Cowardly" to take the option of "Not explaining" leaving that person forever going over and over and over in their mind "WHY?"..

Be it Man or Woman who dares to do this... They are cowards, chosing the "easy" way out, showing "no respect' what so ever for the other person and showing that they have no "heart/soul"..

Guttless.

So, Karma aside and I believe in that too...

That type of person you can "laugh in the rain about" eventually, because had anyone remained in a realtionship with "that type of person" they would eventually be cheated on, used, as that type of person has no concern for the other person and yes, then there would have been a reason, but the pain would be 10 times greater.

In my "opinion" we are much better of and can count our lucky stars to find out what type of person that he/she is now before our hearts are broken even further than now...

They are not worthy of a a good soul... Simple...

CW

CW, I agree. As hard as it can be to tell something like that, it is only ever harder to hear it. People deserve the truth, and to know what is going on. If you're too chicken to tell it to them that makes you something of a loser. I really don't understand what is so difficult about honesty. Well, sure, it can be VERY difficult, but when it comes to the ethical decision, it's a no-brainer.

Reading other women's, and men's, situations, as well as going through it myself, have made me realize that love and all other relationships aren't like the books and movies. It's hard! I came to terms with the fact that I had my "happily ever", now I'm working on the "after" part, the thing they don't show or write about. There is no one man that is 100% prince charming 24/7. There is no family that is like "Little House on the Prairie". And I am allowed to be angry, frustrated, stressed and depressed without feeling guilty for it. One simple sente