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About LinkBacksany real reason? why don't you start and tell us about ur relationship ;D
ladies and gents please come in and tell me...
about your relationship... I honestly want to know how well you get along or dont get along with your partner.. on a daily basis, fights, hot topics, sex life, etc.. I want to get a taste of how other people spend their life with their lovers...
any real reason? why don't you start and tell us about ur relationship ;D
She did Style. I believe it was the one about the 8 years relationship right Pink??
Well, my previous relationship wasnt bad.. just wasnt what was good and healthy for me. My sex life? Pfffttt!!! (as CW would say! ) Virtually non-existant. I could put on the sexiest nightie and throw myself at him to no avail. He thought it was funny that I wanted it so bad.
Lets see now.. we were togther 4 years. I left him once before as he was the most heartless person to me when I had to deal with a couple deaths ont he family. I should have just stayed gone, but he came back when I was sstill emotionally fragile and I took him back. Ever since day 1 he has tried to change me, I am sort of a wild child and he has spent the last 4 years tryignto mold me into the shape of a somewhat Republican housewife. Can you imagine?? It almost worked. Not really his fault though... I allowed him to do those things to me. Towards the end of the relationship i had turned into a roommates feel. He was my best friend,yes, but there wasnt anything more than that.. no love connection, no sex, nothing vaguely romantic..... nothing.
I'd have to say that our "hot topic" was gay issues. My moms gay and I believe in the right for everyone to be able to marry. He did not. Not to say that he didnt like my mom.. just saying that he didnt beleieve in was necessary. This issue came out anytime we drank.... never ended well.
Still though.. I would never say he's a bad person... he just not the right person for me... and why stay with soemone youre not compatible with??? I think I deserve to be knock down,head over heels, in love. I beleieve everyone shoudl have the chance at that!
lol ^^ good story.. BTW my relationship wasnt the 8 year one, it was the almost 5 year one lol.. I dumped my bf but we somehow always end up together.. I love him so much but sometimes I really do get the feeling that were not meant for each other and sometimes I do.. Our sex life? Lately everytime I try to initiate something he tells me his balls hurt lmao... I duno wtf to think anymore. He smokes a lot of weed so im thinking that could be a reason his nuts have spasms. We have that roomie relationship too.. we were once in love but now it seems as though the relationship lost all its spark and romance.. I dont try to turn him on, he doesnt try with me.. When I get off work I come over to his house and hes usually there with a friend, smoking some weed.. So I get off work, we get stoned and watch a movie.. then I either go to class and he stays with his friends or I go home (I always have a mission) and go to sleep after im done for the day. He stays up until 4am on the computer doing god knows what, and wakes up the next day at 1 while im already up and at work by 8:00a.m. I always have crushes on his friends (I currently fantasize about 1 in particular) this is maybe the 4rth friend of his ive liked but thats because "all work and no play makes me a dull girl" lol.. I get bored.. I love the feeling of liking someone, being in love, romance, etc.. He trys to change everything about me from the way I speak, the way I think, my attitude, my sense of humor, my goofiness, my LIFE... I guess he wants to change me for the better.. I would be lying if I said for the worst.. I lay next to him and I have no desire to do anything but lay there.. maybe kiss him.. hes a good kisser.. He doesnt turn me on anymore at all.. well that just shows u how ed up my life is lol
We talk about all sorts of things - from politics to science to history tomovies to gossip. That part of or lives is great.
We never have fights in the sense of arguments, but we both tend to sulk - which is in some ways a lot worse.
We do lots of fun things together. Travel, seeing friends, eating out, going for walks, etc.
Sex is not frequent at all - sadly.
i am not going in my relationships, i am just going to say this.
in most relatiionships, you have the goo-goo-gah-gah stage. cant tell you how long that lasts for each is different. but you cant stop eyeing each other, you think of them all the time, you go out alot and then you get to have lots of fun in bed and all around the house, parking lots, side of the road, everywhere and anywhere.
some will call it the honeymoon stage, right now i call it the retarded stage.
after that has calmed down, you will know how things will get b/c most people have a pattern. you feel too comfy and things calm down. but you still have a romance and passion with each other. now is the time that your real person is revield. each of you are comfortable with each other and you dont have to impress, and go out all the time.
this is where you are tested. if you can take the test and pass, you might make a year.
and each year that goes by, is another test as things now become routine. maybe the guy hangs and watched tv with his hands in his pants like al bundy from married with children. or maybe the woman just sits and watched opra eating bom-boms like peg bundy from married with children.
these are the things you either deal with or you dont as you love the person enough to stay or not.
for you ask this question, i dont think you love him enough or you out grew him period. doesnt matter if he works or sleeps all day, what matters is, can you deal with what is as it may be your future.
if you are unhappy, you have to leave to find your happiness.
if you dream of others, that is normal, and might be a phase in your life. its how you react to those dreams or not.
there are alot of IFs. you have to weigh out all that is going on in your life and put against what you want in your life and what you have in your life.
do you love him or are you safe with him?
there are alot of things you have to decide. each person is different in relationships. and you really can not compare your relationship to others as what works for some might not work for another.
i hope yo make the right choice/decission and you are happy.
but do you talk to him about not being as happy as you want? what are his answers if you do? communication is a huge part of a relationship.
JWB, you are wise beyond your years in some things. When all the dist settles what does matter, is what works for the two of you.
We have been together a few months over 3 years (18 months of that was long distance). We still get on really well. We rarely fight and have never had a serious "we might break up" kind of fight. We don't really have any hot topics but I can be a bit moody, which I'm sure can be difficult for him to manage on occasion.
I still feel very much in love with him and often just look at him admiringly. However, the sex has significantly dropped off in the last couple months. We moved in together and then I was busy finishing my masters. It's gone from 4-5 times a week to 1-2. I definitely feel like my sex drive has decreased. My sister was saying that it seems to her that that always happens when people first move in together. I hope that's just it. I've also been finding it a bit harder to get turned on when we do get busy, which is seriously annoying. Part of the problem is that we're both a bit lazy when it comes to sex and I have a hard time getting "into it" if he doesn't really show passion. He's more of a "lay back and enjoy it" kind of guy.
I kind of wish we had more interesting conversations. He's not much of a philosophical kind of guy so we don't have any really good deep conversations for the most part.
However, he is an awesome guy, treats me wonderfully, and really loves me. I think we've just finally reached the stage of being really comfortable with each other and things not being as exciting all the time.
To the OP, it sounds like a lot of things are going wrong in your relationship and I hope you find some answers about what you really want. You mention him always trying to change everything about you. Sorry, but I generally don't think a pot-head is in the best position to be giving other people life advice!
Well some people say that you shouldn't tempt fate, and for them I can not disagree. But I never learned nothing from playing it safe; I say fate should not tempt me. I take my chances.
Hunn im not trying to knock off what you're saying but just because someone smokes weed it doesnt mean that they arent in the position to give advice.. Thats about one of the funniest things ive ever heard in my life. Many intelligent people smoke, and many stupid people smoke. Should you decide to make an accurate decision on judging someones ability to give advice it should depend on the persons level of intelligence and MAYBE where they stand in life (depending on the advice that you are seeking).I for one like to smoke, just as someone likes their cigg breaks all day.. I like some weed at the end of the day. Might I add that I work 50-60 hours a week and then I go to school from 7-10 getting my Masters in Animal Science. Dont be so quick to judge.
I didn't say "someone who smokes weed". I have no problem with recreational use. I said "a pot-head". To me, a pot-head is the kind of person the OP described - someone who spends all their time smoking and does nothing during the whole day. Maybe there's more to the guy and he actually has ambition and drive. But that's not the impression I got from her description of him.Originally Posted by PinkFloyd
Well some people say that you shouldn't tempt fate, and for them I can not disagree. But I never learned nothing from playing it safe; I say fate should not tempt me. I take my chances.
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