Sex with an ex but w/ NSA??

SomiticPit · 05-16-2009, 09:56 AM

The ex boyfriend and I broke up almost two months ago. Our relationship was real rocky. Jealousy was a major issue for both of us. We are both scorpios if that has anything to do with it and I like to think that it does. Anyway, although I was head over heels for the guy, we couldn't handle fighting anymore and split. I was completely sad over it for a month.

I had a little too much to drink the other night, and like a moron I texted him something dirty. In the morning, I was quite embarrassed by it and texted him back asking him to disregard the message. He said he didn't want to. That led to a chain of dirty messages from both of us and now I am excited about the chance to rock it with him in bed again. The guys who I've hooked up with so far since we broke up haven't stood up to the fun I had with my ex. The only time we seemed to get along was when we were having sex with each other.

My problem is, I don't want to risk the feelings that could be involved. I really don't want a relationship with him anymore. And I'm afraid that having sex with him could lead to him wanting to be with me again, or vice versa because I know I could have a change of heart too. I don't even really want to speak to him. I just want to have sex. I'm tempted to go over there and just tell him "Don't say a word," and have my way with him and then leave.
But is it worth it?

**KaytKayt** · 05-16-2009, 02:52 PM

In all honesty I don't think it's worth it. Ya sure it'd be fun, but it could potentially open a whole can of worms that you would probably much rather keep buried in the ground. Your best bet would probably be to find yourself someone else that you can have fun with and get along with. Also, just a side note, I don't think you both being Scorpios had anything to do with it. My fiance is a Scorpio and I'm a Libra/Scorpio (born on a cusp) and we get along great.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 05-17-2009, 12:59 AM

In reality, your just a booty call if you do that, and you are either going to feel great after ( off course during

) that you are in control, or feel worse after, like you got used, and he is smiling from ear to ear, can have you when ever he wants.

That in itself is dangerous....

It will stop you from moving on.....

And instead you will see him once a week, and when you want to see him another time, all feeling sexy, he will drop the bomb that he can't and you will get peeved off, or worse, you will go out and see him and he will be with another girl.

Let's face it, if he can have you, but your not together, he will be with others, so remember that each time your with him if you decide to do it... Could you cope with that thought?

CW

**ThexMrs** · 05-17-2009, 03:34 AM

It sounds to me that you already know the answer to this. If one night or really, maybe 30 minutes of pleasure is worth risking how you have moved on then go for it but to me it sounds like you don't think it is... So don't do it.

goodguy28 · 06-10-2009, 06:56 PM

I do NOT reccommend sex with the ex. We had a ridiculously hot sex life (unfortunately the best to date) with an ex of a few years ago, and the sex was so good, that we started just one night, that became two nights, then a "lunch meeting" here or there, and so on - ended up going on for months! Worst mistake ever, because we were so bad together in every other area - and it was like we were dating again - all the fighting, etc. I don't plan on ever having sex with an ex again - unless there was a shot of really making the relationship work.

peac3andlov3 · 06-13-2009, 08:06 AM

I agree with everyone else. If you really think that you could handle not being in control and risking your feelings and possibly his then go for it but realistically it's so not worth it. Everything just becomes so much more complicated that eventually no matter how good the sex is its going to have to end and probably not on a good note either. He's your ex for a reason and just because you guys had one thing in common doesn't mean that everything else will magically go away. Good luck I know it can be amazingly hard to say no especially when the sexual chemistry is simply magnetic.

x-Kissy · 06-23-2009, 07:36 AM

it doesnt worth it
because will leads you to nothing and risk again in falling in love with him
why would you sex with him again if your aim is only sex with him, it is wasting time
instead seek a new bf that can make you happu again

so you have 2 choices:

1- decide with him your relationship destiny
2- Either break up completly with him and let him be one of friends list

**stressed** · 06-23-2009, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaytKayt

In all honesty I don't think it's worth it. Ya sure it'd be fun, but it could potentially open a whole can of worms that you would probably much rather keep buried in the ground. Your best bet would probably be to find yourself someone else that you can have fun with and get along with. Also, just a side note, I don't think you both being Scorpios had anything to do with it. My fiance is a Scorpio and I'm a Libra/Scorpio (born on a cusp) and we get along great.

My thoughts exactly. Also, I wouldn't recommend any kind of contact with this man because he can interfere in your next relationship because you're obviously attracted to him. If you have sex with him it will become an addiction and/or a torture because you'd still be together if you worked well as a couple. It's definitely not worth it.

**tritonalum07** · 09-04-2009, 12:07 AM

The fact that he's an ex completely discounts any possibility of there being no strings attached.

**GlitterAndStuds** · 09-04-2009, 06:53 AM

Been there. Done that. It's really not worth it. You'll just remain attached to him, and no matter how much you tell yourself that you're okay with it, you won't be. Especially if you were as crazy about him as you said. I say skip it.

05-16-2009, 09:56 AM	#1
SomiticPit Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 20	Sex with an ex but w/ NSA?? The ex boyfriend and I broke up almost two months ago. Our relationship was real rocky. Jealousy was a major issue for both of us. We are both scorpios if that has anything to do with it and I like to think that it does. Anyway, although I was head over heels for the guy, we couldn't handle fighting anymore and split. I was completely sad over it for a month. I had a little too much to drink the other night, and like a moron I texted him something dirty. In the morning, I was quite embarrassed by it and texted him back asking him to disregard the message. He said he didn't want to. That led to a chain of dirty messages from both of us and now I am excited about the chance to rock it with him in bed again. The guys who I've hooked up with so far since we broke up haven't stood up to the fun I had with my ex. The only time we seemed to get along was when we were having sex with each other. My problem is, I don't want to risk the feelings that could be involved. I really don't want a relationship with him anymore. And I'm afraid that having sex with him could lead to him wanting to be with me again, or vice versa because I know I could have a change of heart too. I don't even really want to speak to him. I just want to have sex. I'm tempted to go over there and just tell him "Don't say a word," and have my way with him and then leave. But is it worth it?

05-17-2009, 12:59 AM	#3
CHANDLERS WISH WH Moderator Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Australia Posts: 9,474 Blog Entries: 6	In reality, your just a booty call if you do that, and you are either going to feel great after ( off course during ) that you are in control, or feel worse after, like you got used, and he is smiling from ear to ear, can have you when ever he wants. That in itself is dangerous.... It will stop you from moving on..... And instead you will see him once a week, and when you want to see him another time, all feeling sexy, he will drop the bomb that he can't and you will get peeved off, or worse, you will go out and see him and he will be with another girl. Let's face it, if he can have you, but your not together, he will be with others, so remember that each time your with him if you decide to do it... Could you cope with that thought? CW __________________ Do we not realise that in order to find a soul It doesn't happen over night if truth were to be told Like everything in life that's hard to achieve you must believe! Register! \| Rules/FAQ \| Contact Mod

05-17-2009, 03:34 AM	#4
ThexMrs Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Oregon. Posts: 2,415 Blog Entries: 13	It sounds to me that you already know the answer to this. If one night or really, maybe 30 minutes of pleasure is worth risking how you have moved on then go for it but to me it sounds like you don't think it is... So don't do it. __________________ "I carry your heart with me, I carry it in my heart, I am never without it, anywhere I go, you go, my dear, And whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling."

09-04-2009, 06:53 AM	#10
GlitterAndStuds Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 648 Blog Entries: 1	Been there. Done that. It's really not worth it. You'll just remain attached to him, and no matter how much you tell yourself that you're okay with it, you won't be. Especially if you were as crazy about him as you said. I say skip it. __________________ I've got to be direct If I'm off please correct You're standing on my neck....

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05-16-2009, 02:52 PM	#2
KaytKayt VIP Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Canada Posts: 40	In all honesty I don't think it's worth it. Ya sure it'd be fun, but it could potentially open a whole can of worms that you would probably much rather keep buried in the ground. Your best bet would probably be to find yourself someone else that you can have fun with and get along with. Also, just a side note, I don't think you both being Scorpios had anything to do with it. My fiance is a Scorpio and I'm a Libra/Scorpio (born on a cusp) and we get along great.

06-10-2009, 06:56 PM	#5
goodguy28 Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 13	I do NOT reccommend sex with the ex. We had a ridiculously hot sex life (unfortunately the best to date) with an ex of a few years ago, and the sex was so good, that we started just one night, that became two nights, then a "lunch meeting" here or there, and so on - ended up going on for months! Worst mistake ever, because we were so bad together in every other area - and it was like we were dating again - all the fighting, etc. I don't plan on ever having sex with an ex again - unless there was a shot of really making the relationship work.

06-13-2009, 08:06 AM	#6
peac3andlov3 Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 5	I agree with everyone else. If you really think that you could handle not being in control and risking your feelings and possibly his then go for it but realistically it's so not worth it. Everything just becomes so much more complicated that eventually no matter how good the sex is its going to have to end and probably not on a good note either. He's your ex for a reason and just because you guys had one thing in common doesn't mean that everything else will magically go away. Good luck I know it can be amazingly hard to say no especially when the sexual chemistry is simply magnetic.

06-23-2009, 07:36 AM	#7
x-Kissy Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 3	it doesnt worth it because will leads you to nothing and risk again in falling in love with him why would you sex with him again if your aim is only sex with him, it is wasting time instead seek a new bf that can make you happu again so you have 2 choices: 1- decide with him your relationship destiny 2- Either break up completly with him and let him be one of friends list

09-04-2009, 12:07 AM	#9
tritonalum07 VIP Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Southern CA Posts: 31	The fact that he's an ex completely discounts any possibility of there being no strings attached.