I think my boyfriend my be BI/GAY

jessy9231 · 06-30-2009, 04:22 PM

I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, and I truly love him but things don't feel right and i don't know what to do. About two months ago, a week before my birthday I went out with my boyfriend and his co-worker ( whom i had no idea was gay) for some drinks, I ended up getting very drink and I can only remember bits and pieces... One of the things that I can remember is the GAY guy telling me that he thought my boyfriend was hot and that he had an amazing ( which I have to agree lol) and he also watched us have sex, and the only reason I know is because my boyfriend told me. When I wake up in the morning I notice that we both slept in his gay friends house, and to be honest I felt very uncomfortable... A week after that he calls me from work and tells me that he was going to a party in his gay friends house, at the time it didn't bother me but then he ended up getting very drunk and slept over the guys house. Now I have nothing against gay man but when they want something they get it!!! On Sunday June 28 I believe was the gay parade and my boyfriend calls me at 5am and tells me that he is home and you can hear a lot of nose in the back round, tells me that his gay friend and another gay are sleeping over!!! I then got very upset and questioned him about what was going on and he got very upset and hung up on me!!! My heart is telling me that he is and it hurts but I know he would never tell me the truth!! Please help me.....

**M&Ms** · 06-30-2009, 04:58 PM

He is definitely showing signs that he is attracted to this guy (considering the sleepovers and his 'friend's' attraction to him). If I were you, I would consider the situation as if this friend were a girl. Would you let your boyfriend stay the night with another girl at her house? Would you let him go to parties with a girl? Would you have sex with your bf in front of this girl after she told you she is attracted to him? Boy or girl, doesn't matter. The fact is, everyone has attractions and if you suspect that he is attracted to this guy, be cautious and don't let him get away with fooling around.

**Tina Lee** · 06-30-2009, 05:31 PM

I also agree.

He needs to know where you stand on this. It's time for the two of you to have a heart to heart chat about this stuff..

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 06-30-2009, 05:38 PM

How did you feel, the next day knowing that your boyfriend's co-worker watched you both have sex? How did your boyfriend re-act to the fact that another man saw you naked, and saw you engaging in sex?

You seem to talk more about whether your boyfriend is gay..

If your free spirited, not a problem but I am curious as to the discussion between the pair of you over that situation.

And, I think your answer will lie there, with regards to how your boyfriend feels about sexuality, and respect of what he classes as his, his girlfriend.

The other thought that comes to mind, is that he hung up when you questioned what he was doing, and he got defensive....

Is he usually, this way? Does he stand up for his thoughts, beliefs or remain "hidden"...

CW

**OhThereYouAre** · 07-01-2009, 10:23 AM

He certainly is exhibiting some gay tendencies.

He's probably bi.

Have a talk with him and figure it out. Then go from there.

Good luck.

**Uneeklyme** · 07-01-2009, 12:48 PM

So let me see if I have this right... Your boyfriend was straight until you found out his friend is gay?

**stressed** · 07-01-2009, 05:13 PM

Explain to him that it makes you uncomfortable to know that he hangs around with a man that could be attracted to him. However, just because his friend is gay doesn't make him gay too. If he's curious and wants to try then this is serious and it's something he has to tell you. In any case, there's a lot of questions that need to be answered and you must talk to him.

06-30-2009, 04:22 PM	#1
jessy9231 Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1	I think my boyfriend my be BI/GAY I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, and I truly love him but things don't feel right and i don't know what to do. About two months ago, a week before my birthday I went out with my boyfriend and his co-worker ( whom i had no idea was gay) for some drinks, I ended up getting very drink and I can only remember bits and pieces... One of the things that I can remember is the GAY guy telling me that he thought my boyfriend was hot and that he had an amazing ( which I have to agree lol) and he also watched us have sex, and the only reason I know is because my boyfriend told me. When I wake up in the morning I notice that we both slept in his gay friends house, and to be honest I felt very uncomfortable... A week after that he calls me from work and tells me that he was going to a party in his gay friends house, at the time it didn't bother me but then he ended up getting very drunk and slept over the guys house. Now I have nothing against gay man but when they want something they get it!!! On Sunday June 28 I believe was the gay parade and my boyfriend calls me at 5am and tells me that he is home and you can hear a lot of nose in the back round, tells me that his gay friend and another gay are sleeping over!!! I then got very upset and questioned him about what was going on and he got very upset and hung up on me!!! My heart is telling me that he is and it hurts but I know he would never tell me the truth!! Please help me.....

06-30-2009, 05:31 PM	#3
Tina Lee Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Canada Posts: 159 Blog Entries: 1	I also agree. He needs to know where you stand on this. It's time for the two of you to have a heart to heart chat about this stuff.. __________________ "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." Ralph Waldo Emerson

06-30-2009, 05:38 PM	#4
CHANDLERS WISH WH Moderator Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Australia Posts: 9,933 Blog Entries: 7	How did you feel, the next day knowing that your boyfriend's co-worker watched you both have sex? How did your boyfriend re-act to the fact that another man saw you naked, and saw you engaging in sex? You seem to talk more about whether your boyfriend is gay.. If your free spirited, not a problem but I am curious as to the discussion between the pair of you over that situation. And, I think your answer will lie there, with regards to how your boyfriend feels about sexuality, and respect of what he classes as his, his girlfriend. The other thought that comes to mind, is that he hung up when you questioned what he was doing, and he got defensive.... Is he usually, this way? Does he stand up for his thoughts, beliefs or remain "hidden"... CW __________________ Do we not realise that in order to find a soul It doesn't happen over night if truth were to be told Like everything in life that's hard to achieve you must believe! Register! \| Rules/FAQ \| Contact Mod

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
my boyfriend is ....	hilal	Dating	6	06-28-2009 10:05 PM
i have never done anything with my boyfriend but want to... help	ildbwj	The Lounge	4	05-18-2009 10:25 PM
My boyfriend doesn't want sex as much as i do	kjax016	Sex	10	03-18-2009 02:20 AM
My mom does NOT like my boyfriend :(	chocolata1009	Dating	6	06-19-2008 10:10 PM
How can I get rid of my boyfriend!?	ravelitex	Dating	2	08-06-2007 04:34 PM

06-30-2009, 04:58 PM	#2
M&Ms VIP Member Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 35	He is definitely showing signs that he is attracted to this guy (considering the sleepovers and his 'friend's' attraction to him). If I were you, I would consider the situation as if this friend were a girl. Would you let your boyfriend stay the night with another girl at her house? Would you let him go to parties with a girl? Would you have sex with your bf in front of this girl after she told you she is attracted to him? Boy or girl, doesn't matter. The fact is, everyone has attractions and if you suspect that he is attracted to this guy, be cautious and don't let him get away with fooling around.

07-01-2009, 10:23 AM	#5
OhThereYouAre Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Cincinnati Posts: 1,302	He certainly is exhibiting some gay tendencies. He's probably bi. Have a talk with him and figure it out. Then go from there. Good luck.

07-01-2009, 12:48 PM	#6
Uneeklyme Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Montana Posts: 305	So let me see if I have this right... Your boyfriend was straight until you found out his friend is gay?

07-01-2009, 05:13 PM	#7
stressed Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Europe Posts: 147	Explain to him that it makes you uncomfortable to know that he hangs around with a man that could be attracted to him. However, just because his friend is gay doesn't make him gay too. If he's curious and wants to try then this is serious and it's something he has to tell you. In any case, there's a lot of questions that need to be answered and you must talk to him.