confusedbyhim

I have two prior posts. One about facebook and one about what i should do? Since my posts there have been various other issues and I tried to discuss them with him. He said he didn't feel well and didn't want to talk or listen. He told me to tell him what I needed to say and say it quickly. I told him that I did love him and that I would like a relationship with him but that I didn't feel like he had the time at the moment and that there is just too many things going on. I talked to him on Tuesday. When I went to leave he says well thank you very much for your drastic decision making. I told him I don't know what else to do that if he ever needed to talk to please call me. Tuesday he never called and yesterday he didn't either. I called him just to have small talk and he acted like he was brushing me off. I do love him and I do want him back . My friends say I need to let it be and give him his space to resolve all the issues in his head. I do want him back but not under the conditions that we have had over the past few months. What do I do? Do I not call him anymore and take it as if it is over? Why is he now acting indifferent? I don't know how to handle any of this. My friends say that I need to see what happens that this is the only tactic I haven't tried. but it has been a day and he acts as if he doesn't even care.

OhThereYouAre

I know you don't want to hear this, but-

Yes. Don't call him.

If he doesn't call you...that's showing he doesn't really care.

Which means you probably should let him go.

Good luck.

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"People who lack the sense to question Big Lies always end up in deep trouble..."

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Miya

I agree with OTYA. Don't care him and if he doesn't call you then it's pretty clear he doesn't want to be with you. It's difficult but at least you'd have your answer. Then you could move on with your life and find someone who really loves and wants to be with you.

__________________
Do not dwell in the past,
do not dream of the future,
concentrate the mind on the present moment.

-Lord Buddha

confusedbyhim

Shouldn't I try to talk to him about it?

Miya

From your original post though dear it sounds like you have already tried to talk to him about it. You finally left and he retorted with the thank you very much comment. The way I see it (and not just you but everyone) is that the relationship has to be 2 way. You have already given him the opportunity to talk and stay in a relationship with you, and even now if he called and apologized et al. I bet you'd take him back. Now it's really the time to see how he feels. You shouldn't have to beg or be needy for his love. Just as he shouldn't for yours. Give it a little bit of time.

__________________
Do not dwell in the past,
do not dream of the future,
concentrate the mind on the present moment.

-Lord Buddha

GlitterAndStuds

I agree with OTYA and Miya... and your friends. It sucks, but you need to let him be for a while. He seems to be making it clear that he's just not looking for the same things that you are. It's not a good sign if you're calling him and calling him and he never changes his attitude, or show the same effort.

Most of the time, when guys act like this, there's no way to change their mind or talk them out of it. Their minds are made up. And if he's like any of those guys, the more you try to talk to him about it, the more agitated he's going to become and thus, pull further away from you.

Don't keep making yourself available for him. Hang out with your friends, do your own thing... let him be. If he comes around, great. If not, then you also have your answer.

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confusedbyhim

He is always telling me that I am psycho and to let him be etc etc...like this is all my fault. He says that I am not okay in the head in those exact words. Yet he can do whatever he wants. I feel like he is completely pushing me away. i did try to talk to him this morning and he says all you are doing is checking up on me and I am sick of you being crazy.

confusedbyhim

Now he is telling me that he doesn't want a relationship that I am not well mentally...that he has no feelings for me etc etc

Miya

Then you have your answer. Why would you even wish to be with someone who spoke to you this way? There are many more good people in the world who wouldn't do/say this kind of thing.

__________________
Do not dwell in the past,
do not dream of the future,
concentrate the mind on the present moment.

-Lord Buddha

GlitterAndStuds

Guys are great like that. If you want a relationship and you don't, then they automatically throw you in the "psycho" bin. It's a pretty bad way to find out, but now you know exactly where he is. He said outright that he doesn't want a relationship, so now you can move on with your life.

It's not all about guys. Now you can feel free to do your own thing, go out with your friends and have some fun. Forget him. As Miya said, there are plenty of people out there for you to meet that will treat you like a queen, as they should. And those are people you won't NEED to check on all the time. I'm sorry he turned out to be such an as* but you're better off.

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