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Thread: can avoiding a man turn him on???

  1. #1
    Junior Member Array classy_lady's Avatar
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    Default can avoiding a man turn him on???

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    It has happened to me on several occasions that I caught men's attention (unplanned but I was attracted to them). I felt ill at ease once they initiated eye contact and got in my physical space (not too close). I started avoiding them. I thought that would make them back off, but to my surprise, it became the opposite. How do you explain that? A guy's perspective is highly appreciated!

  2. #2
    WH Moderator & WINNER OF BEST THREAD MARCH & JUNE 2011- Don't mes with Mes T Array Mes T's Avatar
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    Well I'm not a guy but I too have had this happen, and in the past I've even done it myself!! It's all about the appeal of the unattainable, or of the chase.

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    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    Ignoring a guy or acting like you're not interested is a sure way to get them to pay attention to you.
    Hard work beats talent, when talent doesn't work hard.

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  4. #4
    WH Super Moderator Array Hopeless Dork's Avatar
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    Yeah, unfortunately it can. It works for some women as well. Many people claim to despise games but set themselves up to play them all the time.

    The thrill of the hunt? The whole conquer the world thing? An ego boost? Some people see someone they are attracted to and upon realizing the object of their attraction is not mutually interested... they retreat and move on.. for others they see it as a challenge and will persue persue persue... usually to no avail but they do wear down some people eventually and get that date.

    But guys/girls that are into this behavior once they have that mate they sought tend to let their eyes wonder to the next conquest... and then the next... they get excitement from trying to get what they cant have and once they get it they don't want it.
    Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

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    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array ocularone's Avatar
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    i can honestly say this doesn't work on me one bit. If i notice a girl AVOIDING me..i tend to take the message as it is- "she is avoiding you so she obviously isnt interested in you..and if she is then she is playing head games". And i don't play head games. Nor do I find it attractive when girls do.

    Some guys are slightly slow and as equally persistent, so it works on them.
    "I met in the street a very poor young man who was in love. His hat was old, his coat worn, his cloak was out at the elbows, the water passed through his shoes, - and the stars through his soul."- Victor Hugo

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    Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Array PJhavinfunagain's Avatar
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    the men that this generally works on are not usually the one you want long term.
    "When one door closes, another opens. But we often look so regretfully upon the closed door that we don't see the one that has opened for us."
    Helen Keller

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    WH Head Moderator Array WildChild's Avatar
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    hmmm, Mr Collins from, Pride and Prejudice comes to mind.
    We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer

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    I wonder if maybe the guy is (secretly) hurt that you're ignoring him and wants to prove to you that he is worth knowing.

    Other times it is possibly just a guy who doesn't care about what others want only what he wants. (I thought these "psychopaths" mainly only existed in movies until I met some along the way in life).

  9. #9
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    I'm in the same boat as ocularone. If I see a woman obviously ignoring me, I'm going to turn the other way and not even approach her or engage in conversation. If you initially gave them some glimmer of hope by locking eyes and smiling or something, some guys will continue on thinking you're playing hard to get once they approach you and you ignore them. Then again, some guys are just dumb.

  10. #10
    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array ocularone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cuff View Post
    Then again, some guys are just dumb.
    so true...we really are sometimes
    "I met in the street a very poor young man who was in love. His hat was old, his coat worn, his cloak was out at the elbows, the water passed through his shoes, - and the stars through his soul."- Victor Hugo

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