Thread: what do i do?!

well theres a guy that ive been best friends with for four years and ive always liked him. we're always inseparable. everyone has always said that either we are dating, should date, or are about to date. but he got a girlfriend, very out of the blue for him, about three or four months ago. and this girl is bad news. i used to be friends with her and i know how she opperates, the whole school says shes the biggest . so once he got this girlfriend i just tried to face the fact that were only friends. so i started talking to this other guy again. we were close last summer but he started his first year of college and we sorta drifted. then we started to keep in touch by messageing through facebook. and he would occasionally come back to our school to visit again. he seemed to be showing up there more and more. we started getting very close again and were liking each other again. then on march 26, he came to school to perform in our school's annual Mock Rock. him and his friend won it two years in a row then they graduated. but mock rock is where you take a song and perform funny to it basically. or to imitate. one year they performed to the song 'Stayin' Alive' and wore disco outifts. its was awesome. but anyway the school asked them to come back and perform the intro and be the judges. so i hung out with him the entire day. and we stayed after school to hang out until 7 that night. when i left i was confident with what we had. that night he texted me and told me, "i did something stupid, im the stupidest person in the world. i dont deserve you. however, i will do whatever it takes for you to forgive me." he kissed the other guys girlfriend! the guy ive always liked. yeah his girlfriend. n i was sorta turned off by this. i decided i didnt really like him as much anymore. than that other guy that ive always liked. he asked if there was anything going on between me and the guy ive been tlaking to. and i told him whats going on. my guy ive salways liked has broken up with his girlfriend. and he told me that hes always liked me and wants to date me soon. the thing is is that he is planning on going to college in hawaii. but i dont care, i want to date him instead of wait and wonder then date him. its what ive always wanted. so i told the other guy about my talk with this guy. and the other guy told me goodbye and that were friends and not to be upset but were just not meant to be for now. and i was ok with that because i had this other guy now. i wasnt dating this other guy but we were going on a date that saturday. and we went on the date and it was terrible. we did a a double date but an extra guy showed up and hes a a bad kid. i dont even know why he was htere. so the guys basically did weed. and my guy has never done it before. and lets jsut say it was all abd. but my guy came back and apologized and we talked throught it. but one of his friends told me that my guy said he onlu sees me as a friend. which i dont get because thats not what my guy said to me. so i didnt know what to believe. so i started thinking about that other other guy again. i havent talked to him yet because he said goodbye. but i do miss him and want him in my life but dont want to date him. im just trying to forget about it and move on. but should i try to even tlak to him? or no. and what should i do about this guy that i think likes me but i dont know if he still does. or whats going on...?? help please

Hehe, hey Amy. Ok maybe i will attempt to give you my own insight on your situation. Let me first start by saying that when i read through your post, a couple key things stick out to me. You are in college and going through lots of life changes, just like everyone does in college. It's a very weird and sometimes difficult time for relationships...especially when you attend different schools. You both are constantly meeting new people, new friends, new experiences. You seem to be really caught up on the idea of having a boyfriend. Whether it's "mike" or "ethan"..you seem like you could bounce to either one...You had a great thing with mike and he even said that he liked you. I couldn't really see any reason why that wouldn't be true (like his friend told you) unless there were some alterior motive for him to say that to you (like perhaps to get you into bed). However, it doesn't seem like that's the case to me. It's more likely that is friend who claims mike doesn't like you any more than just a friend, is either mistaken or is lying about it. Now Ethan also seems to like you a lot. He definitely kissed another girl which is a no no..however i will give him credit for offering that information to you first hand, and apologizing. Both guys seem like that have their red flags, and their strong points also. My best advice to you would just be to chill out for a while. Don't be so desperate to be with one or the other right now. Just live your life, go to class, continue to meet people and maintain your friendships with both guys. You are so young and honestly still fairly immature. I know that sounds like i'm knocking you but i promise i am not. Immaturity sounds bad, but i really just mean it as in you still have some growing up to do..you are still pretty confused about what kind of guy you like..should he be attentive to you (which you say turns you off of them for some reason), or should he be aloof (which makes you want him to be attentive). Seems a little contradictory doesn't it? I just don't think you actually know what you even want yet..and sometimes that just takes TIME. Maturity is sometimes as simple as knowing who you are and what you want...To me, it doesn't sound like you know that yet. If both of these guys are friends of yours..you will still know them down the road. Within time, you will mature more and start to realize what it is you are really looking for in a PARTNER. Right now you just seem to want a boyfriend because that's what young women do..they have boyfriends. I'm sorry this advice probably doesnt make sense so let me just paraphrase my key points one last time:

-Don't get caught up in having aboyfriend because it's "in"
-Spend some time just being single and figure out what you want in a partner
-Maintain your friendships with both mike and ethan
-If one of them is meant for you..i am confident you will discover that on your own with TIME
-Always rely on direct communication from the SOURCE..not through friends of the source..it can become skewed

i hope this helped even a tiny bit