Would you take control of your Significant Others Hen/Stag Party?

**Joey** · 05-09-2010 12:39 PM

Im just curious - as one of my friends is getting married soon, and she is having a MAJOR imput sesh in her other halfs Stag party - insisting he has no strippers, go abroad etc etc - whereas he seems to be not bothered in the slightest what she gets up to on her night.

Have you ever or would ever take a small portion of control on what happens on their stag/hen party? or would you just leave them to do what they will?

xxx

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 05-09-2010 12:49 PM

Very good question.

I think that I would discuss it, "seeing as I am going to get married again

) just so he knows what I'm doing and if there was something he didn't like, we would discuss that and come to a conclusion, but strangely, as I trust him, I wouldn't get involved, I'd laugh at anything that was planned, I'm convinced of that.

It's not that he doesn't trust me either, it's just personal beliefs, but I reckon he would do the same, not worry, and laugh as well..

CW

**Joey** · 05-09-2010 02:50 PM

id like to think that i wouldnt want to muzzle on into the stag party plans. I think your right CW when you say about discussing together. Atleast then you can share your worries, and things that you will not be keen on hearing when its the aftermath.

My friend was saying that she didnt want strippers at her husband to be's stag party - or going to any form of pole dancing club. I can see the stag party novelty behind pole dancing clubs - something in which i have no issue with - and say hypothetically i was marrying my current partner - would have no issue him going to on his party. My only issue would be towards lap dancing. that for me is a no no - i feel that it is waaaay to intimate - a stranger grinding herself against my man. ha! That would be my only input to the whole thing.

**baja** · 05-10-2010 07:05 PM

I personally wouldn't get involved with it at all. If it was me, the less I know about it the better. However, that being said, I can understand why someone might want their fiance to have input into the event.

**Fallen1** · 05-10-2010 07:19 PM

I personally don't understand the stag/hen party thing. I never wanted one and neither my ex or current husband had one.

**Mes T** · 05-10-2010 08:04 PM

I think the whole strippers (and etc) thing is ridiculous to have on a night like that and is essentially wiping the floor with the relationship you have with your partner, instead of giving it the respect you'd hope it deserves.

What about just... hanging out with your friends? Sitting around and having a good time with the people you care about? Why turn it into something that could hurt your partner?

So, I guess to answer your question, YES I would definitely have input. And if my partner pushed for things that I disagreed with, I would reconsider marrying him. But I'd like to think that my current partner and I are in agreement in this regard.

**LanaBear** · 05-10-2010 09:14 PM

I think when the intention is to do things that you wouldn't do if your SO was with you, is wrong... Like Mes T said, just hanging out, having a good time is what it should be about.

A bunch of friends planned a nice dinner at one of my favorite restaurants and my hubby and his friends when up backpacking into the mountains for the weekend. It was nice, relaxing and neither of us did anything that we wouldn't do without the other or that had the potential for hurting the other.

**grrrr** · 05-10-2010 10:02 PM

I don't get the whole "stripper" thing.... for my 25th, my friends got me a stripper for my B-Day - not really what I was after, I thought that it was a party at my friends house rife with fondu wine and laughs. What made it worse was that he took it ALL OFF.... and wiggled the junk in my face. I vomited. Probably not the reaction that he was after! But hey... I'm not prude, but that was over the top!

That said, I don't really care if my hubs goes to stag parties with his friends.... If he wanted "plastic" and "fake" everything, he wouldn't be with me, and more importantly, I certainly wouldn't be with him!

I do agree that it's a total waste of time - for both parties involved. I think that just having fun with friends is more fun than the giltz and glam of people you don't know putting themselves in strange stripping circimstances....

**stressed** · 05-11-2010 06:03 AM

I could be wrong here, but I neither want such a party for myself, nor my fiance. When the time comes I'd like us to do something together with all our friends involved and nothing separate. It's not about trusting your SO, it's about certain idiotic people wanting to have fun with those who are about to marry and involve strippers and clubs even when it's not in the plan just to laugh at them.

So, no, thanks. I rather be able to sleep that night.

**pretzel** · 05-11-2010 06:37 AM

Originally Posted by CHANDLERS WISH

Very good question.

I think that I would discuss it, "seeing as I am going to get married again

) just so he knows what I'm doing and if there was something he didn't like, we would discuss that and come to a conclusion, but strangely, as I trust him, I wouldn't get involved, I'd laugh at anything that was planned, I'm convinced of that.

It's not that he doesn't trust me either, it's just personal beliefs, but I reckon he would do the same, not worry, and laugh as well..

CW

I know I haven't been around as much as usual, but did I miss something major?