Do you think it's inappropriate for a guy to say this?

**Magnetism** · 05-16-2010 06:18 PM

I need an objective viewpoint here. I haven't even met this guy. We're just talking on the phone. He's already asking if I have a nice butt, and how this woman who walked by him has a killer body. Here I am thinking.."Why the heck is he telling me this?" He gives the usual "Other girls don't mind when I ask this. They're care-free." He's also asking for full body pics of me. He says he's looking for a serious relationship, but these questions are causing me to want to back off.

I just don't think this is appropriate to ask when you just met someone. That's like me asking a guy I just met"How big is your penis?" or "How much money do you have in your bank account?" Chances are a lot of guys won't take me seriously for a long-term relationship.

Yeah, I know how you look and if the person is sexually attractive is important when choosing a mate. But, being so forward by asking "Do you have a nice butt?" when you haven't even met in person? He did respect the fact that I don't like those kind of questions when I'm not committed to someone, but still...It makes me wonder if people bother to learn dating etiquette.

Just my two cents.

**WildChild** · 05-16-2010 06:27 PM

Sounds like you need to say, "Next". And leave this one alone.

**Magnetism** · 05-16-2010 06:34 PM

Heh, thanks for the validation.

I do struggle with hurting people's feelings and rejecting them, but I guess that's life.

**Mes T** · 05-16-2010 07:01 PM

I doubt someone like that would actually get "hurt" in the sense that a more appropriate guy would.

Heck he'd probably just hang up the phone and go pinch a walker's-by behind within the same minute.

Yuck.

**Hopeless Dork** · 05-16-2010 08:18 PM

In one way I do understand him asking for full picture up front... as some women AND men can exxagerate their appearance (and some of course don't give it the credit its due) and guys and girls on phone line chats have probably met their share of people using the service for entertainment more than realtionships.

But talking about another persons butt... asking if yours is nice -- way innapropriate. The first being tacky and the second being a stupid highly subjective question.

**bonbon143** · 05-16-2010 10:00 PM

Hi Panera Bread,

The fact that you are already repulsed by his behavior, in addition to the fact you've never met him, make it DOUBLE YUCK on his part.

You can do better! You deserve a wonderful guy that makes you smile and doesn't make you feel like a piece of meat.

And, don't ever give away pics if you don't know the person. It's dangerous and demented of them to even request that.

Take care and good luck!

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 05-16-2010 10:08 PM

I think full "body" picture is different than a photo of you, somehow in his little mind

There's nothing to feel guilty of.. You have never met him, him you.. So, like boys can be boys, he's trying to see how much he can get from you, and all the other ladies "on-line" whilst he's at it, a bit of a game.

It's definately not a gentleman thing to do, so you wouldn't want to go out with him anyway..

CW

**Joey** · 05-18-2010 03:54 AM

I would only send out a full body picture message of you - to a guy that you havent even seen or met yet - if you want to see it up on the internet in a few days time.

You mention that he is wanting a long term relationship. do you honestly think that the questions hes asking are coming from the lips of a guy who actually wants that? i would have assumed if he had never met you, and was looking for a long term relationsip, instead of asking how your butt is and wanting pics of you, wanting to actually meet you to talk about you as a person, not as a piece of meat.

and like you say,why would he ever want to just randomly mention to you mid phone call of some other womens 'killer body'?? If that doesnt have sleeze bag written all over it i dont know what does.

**Hopeless Dork** · 05-18-2010 08:40 AM

Originally Posted by Joey

I and like you say,why would he ever want to just randomly mention to you mid phone call of some other womens 'killer body'?? If that doesnt have sleeze bag written all over it i dont know what does.

It completely has sleeze bag written all over it. I can't think of WHY he would say such a thing while he's trying to wooo you into a date... I can only imagine he is some poor guy trying to follow some lame pick up artist community technique of inspiring competitiion -- like ohhh if i tell her this woman is awesome she will be more inspired to send me her pick and show she's more awesome. But sorry... he just comes off like a jerk that doesn't think before he speaks.

One word: FAIL