I don't think I want sex anyomre..

**astranger2** · 09-02-2010 11:23 PM

I am eighteen years old and I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now.. He is the first guy that I have ever had sex with and I find him very sexually and physically attractive, however, I don't feel "in the mood" much anymore.

In the beginning of the relationship we were having sex, approximately 3 to 5 times a week; sometimes more if he stayed the night or came to visit during the day. Now, I don't want to have sex as much and now he asks or hints at least every day and it irritates me. Some days, I tell him that I don't want to, and he starts to touch on me, and I just have sex with him anyway so he'll leave me alone for the rest of the day/night. But then the next morning, it's right back to square one and I get irritated. It is putting a lot of strain on our relationship and I don't know what to do.

I don't know if it is relevent or has anything to do with this, but recently I have gained a bit of weight and I feel severly self concious because of new stretch marks because of the weight gain. My boyfriend knows this, but he insists that it's not an issue but tends to mention more than I'd like to hear about.

What should I do?n

**geedee** · 09-02-2010 11:29 PM

Well I can tell you this..... that weight doesn't mean a thing to him....... he's gonna want to have sex with you regardless........ so that insecurity is only your in that department. You just have to know that he doesn't care about that.... he just wants sex with you no matter what. I hope that helps. Try and spice it up, I know how you feel. How about bringing sex toys into the bedroom..... maybe that would help your desire..... also if you feel comfortable with it you could mention to him that you could watch him masturbate if he has that constant desire and you don't. Again, hope that helps.

**jns** · 09-03-2010 12:14 AM

What are you doing for birth control? Some forms of birth control really mess with the libido.

**Hopeless Dork** · 09-03-2010 12:58 AM

Well you are 18... and your sex drive is going to wean and wane for years to come... you will have periods of time where you want it often and periods of time where you could take it or leave it etc. How you feel about yourself, your relationship, your stress factor, your sleep schedule, your hormone levels, your diet, medications, depression... any number of things can negatively impact your drive.

I wouldnt fear that you are going to hate sex forever because you are going through a phase of not wanting it much.. I think the sexier I feel the more I want sex, so if you are feeling a little down about your body -- it could be whats impacting your desires.

Do something that makes you feel good about you, start eating healthy, get involved in an activity... even if you don't want to lose weight, or its slow to happen... sometimes just being more fit can make you FEEL more fit, and thus more sexy etc.

**Mes T** · 09-03-2010 05:31 AM

How about orgasms, do you have them during sex? Seems like lack of orgasms, and the wrong kind of birth control pill, are two of the BIGGEST reasons for a woman to lose her drive.

**WildChild** · 09-03-2010 06:52 AM

Why have you gained weight? Are you taking any meds? There are many chemicals that can affect your wieght and your libido.
How affectionate is he? Do you feel loved and cared about?

**hizenberg** · 09-04-2010 07:15 AM

does he turn you on? and are you on birth control,this can mess up your libido.also do you orgasm during sex,all these could be factors you could think about.

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