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Thread: What qaulities do women look for in a man(both superficial and deep)?

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    Default What qaulities do women look for in a man(both superficial and deep)?

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    I have dated a bit. However, I haven't been able to pin-point what qualities women look for in a guy.

    I just want some responses so I have stuff to work on. Of course, it isn't possible for you all to give me a cookie cutter model to work with as each girl has different taste.


    The superficial qualities will attract a mate first. Afterwords, it's the deep qualities she will look at


    Here are a few qualities that a girl might look for

    Superficial:

    -Facial Features

    -Muscles

    -Financial stability(this depends on if the girl wants kids. If she doesn't, merely making enough to provide for himself is ok)


    Non-superficial:

    -Compassion

    -Work ethic

    -Reliability

    -Intellect

    -Stability(No one wants to date a mental case)

    -Humor

    Everything I have listed is what I have noticed to be some key qaulities women look for. I am curious what else a women might look for?

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    VIP Member Array heatherswar's Avatar
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    What qualities I look for in a man...
    Superficial-
    -Well groomed, not GQ but clean, well kept. Like they take care of themselves.
    -I don't care brown hair from blonde but I am not a fan of long hair or hair that looks better then mine. Lol.
    -Weight isn't a real issue as long as they are taking care of themselves. Some people are naturally bigger, that's okay.
    Non-superficial-
    -Confidence WITHOUT being cocky. You can be confident but the second you appear the slighest bit to into yourself or think you're better then others (including me), it's a deal breaker.
    -Kind, sincere, and compassion. People may think that a sweet, kind guy is lame. Whatever, I would take lame over an a**hole any day of the week!
    -Honest and open kind of goes with the above. If I feel there are secrets that could be effecting the relationship I will start to question the entire relationship.
    -Reliable and stable. This is important because, not all, but many girls even in a casual relationship look somewhat into the future. He has had 4 jobs in the last year and a half, not from lack of work but lack of work ethic (quitting, being fired). Is he stable enough to see a future with? Can I rely on him to be there for me in a time of need, emotionally, if my car breaks down would he pick me up if he wasn't busy, if I asked a favor and he said okay to it, would he follow through with it. And yes the mental case thing too.
    -SENSE OF HUMOR!!! I love to laugh, have a good time. He would need to provide that, not in a blonde joke but just an overall attitude of having fun but the ability to be serious when the time is right.

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    Superficial:

    -Facial Features - "manly" rather than boyish

    -Muscles - not a six pack fan, but in good / healthy shape. Broad or expansive shoulders couldn't hurt

    -Financial stability(this depends on if the girl wants kids. If she doesn't, merely making enough to provide for himself is ok) - well, a job is good but it depends on the person. Attitude and goals are more important.


    Non-superficial:

    -Compassion - yes but not too compassionate - be assertive enough and considerate.

    -Work ethic - hard worker is a plus but knows how to balance work and social life

    -Reliability - goes without saying / everyone wants that

    -Intellect - as long we compliment each other intellectually, then that's good. We don't need to be in the same area though

    -Stability(No one wants to date a mental case) - yeah, but even if they stray off into the deep end, as long as they can find their way back with my and some professional help, then it could work.

    -Humor - helps but shouldn't be overdone

    - Provides emotional support (high on the list)

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    Superficial:
    Well Groomed, but not someone who takes more time and effort than I do (i.e someone who knows where the shower is, how to use a razor and dresses well, but not high fashion)

    Tall and broad shoulders

    No substancial facial hair

    Physically Healthy and interest is sports or physical activity

    Non - Superficial:

    Humour and the ability to laugh at themselves and not take themselves seriously all of the time

    Kindness and Compassion

    Intellect: To be able to hold a conversation and awareness of current affairs is so attractive to me

    Stability

    Work Ethic

    Glass is half full mentality!!
    "Eventually all the pieces fall into place...until then, laugh at the confusion, live for the moment and know that everything happens for a reason".

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    honesty. just like the saying 'honesty is the best policy' i.m.o. and b.t.w. your 'superficial' financial stability theory is not a must for a real woman.A real woman will look for a man who is going to be honest,reliable,trustworthy,loving,humourous (can let the last one slide if he has all 4 other qualitys) I would take a man with these qualitys anyday over a man with 'money' and 'mucles' and nothing inside.
    A guy who makes a woman feel special from time to time is a plus i guess,not with material things but with attention. That is true we do like attention,but a good woman will only take it from her man.

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    jns
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    As a guy, I have seen these things a little different. As a frequent traveler to SE Asia, I have seen other cultures that have different values than here, especially amongst the poor and even middle class. Financial considerations and stability come in high on the list as does hygiene. The physical traits are less important. Humor is a good quality. Helping and compassion to family is highly desired as is honesty.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jns View Post
    As a guy, I have seen these things a little different. As a frequent traveler to SE Asia, I have seen other cultures that have different values than here, especially amongst the poor and even middle class. Financial considerations and stability come in high on the list as does hygiene. The physical traits are less important. Humor is a good quality. Helping and compassion to family is highly desired as is honesty.
    I seriously laughed at this post.


    I think expecting your partner/spouse to have good personal hygiene should be an expectation....


    That's like saying "I think having a properly functioning respiratory system is a plus"



    Common man...

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    You would be surprised to find out how many men and women think that showering and vigorously washing in a hot and humid climate is not necessary. And then using something to limit body odor. I believe I could extend it to over half of the human race. So, I don't think it is equivalent to a respiratory system. Of the most odorous in my travels, Europeans as a group take the prize. Of course, I haven't traveled to other parts of Asia, Africa, Europe and South America. Of the indigenous peoples of SE Asia, as a group, their hygiene is better than in the US. Of course, washing your butt after is better than wiping with paper.

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    Yeah "good" hygiene certainly varies from person to person, culture to culture. One person might think brushing your teeth twice a day is good hygiene, while another might think that brushing 3 times and flossing 2 times is an absolute must. Try getting those two together!

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    I don't think it's quite so easy to categorize the qualities like that. For example, many women will notice your sense of humor right away while not giving much importance to your financial stability.

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