Thread: How do you bring this up when your with somebody new?

Originally Posted by WildChild

Some people do go through periods of time when they do not have a committed relationship and have sexual interaction with more than one person. Personally I'm a serial monogamist, I prefer having sexual relations with only one man in my life at a time, as I like to real know them and have a deeper intimacy. I was just making the point that your situation would not be an issue for many women and if you learn to use your hands and tongue to good effect, you could be an exceptional lover. Many men never really acquire any real sexual skill with any part of their bodies and aren't good at emotional intimacy either. The women in their lives end up shutting down sexually or weren't really into it in the first place - not a good situation for anyone.

You may have regarded your physical situation as a liability but you could turn it into an asset, with the right attitude.

I agree a lot with this. Penetration is not what makes good sex, even if like in WC's case there are women who prefer it. If you take a look at the percentages, most women have a great difficulty to reach an orgasm by penetration and do not find sex any less pleasuring without reaching a vaginal orgasm (I am one of those). You have your tongue, your hands, there are plenty of toys one can use on his partner, the list is endless. As long as you have the will to pleasure your partner in ways other than just by intercourse it will not be a problem. Like WC said, many men never learn how to pleasure their partner and many times that is so because they believe women only want intercourse, or should be satisfied by intercourse only, which is not true.

A man eager to please his partner in every possible way other than by penetration beats the one who only offers penetration without eagerness, passion or intimacy. I believe that being with a man who feels more during intercourse, but doesn't have any passion, doesn't care about pleasing, doesn't want to explore sex, is a lot worse than being with a man who cannot have intercourse but wants, and does, please in so many other ways.