Should i break up??

**idon't** · 09-24-2010 03:40 AM

Hi everyone!
For the last 5 months i've been wanting to break up with my bf.The reason is because i found out some gay sites on his pc history.He told me he has gay tendencies but that it wasn't a big deal at all because he'd always want to date girls and be with me.I believed him but the thing is that i can't quite deal with this.During 5 months i've been tortured by the thought of it,i've had bad dreams about it and sometimes he gave me the impression of checkin' out men. So,the thing is that i can see he's crazy about me but his feminine manners and the whole story won't let me relax!I told him that i couldn't stand it being confused and messed-up all the time and that i had to leave him and he asked me to go and see him in a few days,have a great time with him(go to the movies,etc) and then brake-up piecefully. As weird as it may sound i said yes. There are also other reasons why i want to end it.He is very lazy, he wakes up at 3-4:00 in the afternoon, he doesn't follow courses in his university and he's sometimes telling me lies that he actually does.And when i talk to him about that he gets mad.Anyway...The thing is, i broke up with him once in the past and i was wrong,back then.I don't want to hurt him again or be hurt.Am I making the right decision?I love him so much,i don't know what to do.

**WildChild** · 09-24-2010 06:18 AM

Only you can make this decision but it does sound like he needs to make some changes and you need to have someone to really share things with.

**steanna7** · 09-24-2010 06:23 AM

i dont know i think it was good of him to admit the gay tendacies, he could have lied but can you deal with him wanting a guy sometimes, i know people usually act out on there wants eventually when the oppurtunity arises, so you have to ask yourself how much can you handle.

**WildChild** · 09-24-2010 06:40 AM

This is a touchy area and he owes it to both of you to get clear on his preferences. Unless you dislike sex, it is not your role in life to be his closet cover.

**idon't** · 09-24-2010 07:32 AM

The truth is,he admited it after lots of lies.But what does "gay tendencies" exanctly mean?Will i have any regrets if i let him go?We've been together for years,it's not easy.

**sourpuss** · 09-24-2010 08:06 AM

All of the gay stuff aside, it sounds like you're not into him anyway. You say he's lazy and he lies. That seems to bother you just as much.

**idon't** · 09-24-2010 08:19 AM

Yeah, i don't know...Why do i find it so hard then?

**sourpuss** · 09-24-2010 08:30 AM

You're feeling sorry for him that you'll hurt his feelings. But the truth is, he deserves someone who loves, respects and accepts him as much as you deserve the same things. Staying with him to spare him is doing neither of you any favors.