Finding someone after you've had the best?

**Little_Miss_Me** · 10-18-2010 08:27 AM

So, I was wondering if anyone's ever been in my situation.

I had a relationship that ended a little bit back. The relationship was a nice one, but the more I look at it -- we just weren't right for each other. Anyway, one thing about this guy is he excelled in bed. I'm talking about hands-down fifty times better than anyone else I've experienced (and while I'm not some guru, I'm not innocent/inexperienced). Everything from kissing to actually having sex was like a dream, and I've never had that type of connection before.

After about six months he broke up with me, and like I said, the more I look back, the better the decision seems.

I'm curious though if anyone's been in this situation, is the experience the same with someone else?

I'm just worried I'll find a good man and not desire him. Thoughts?

**idon't** · 10-18-2010 09:26 AM

That's a situation i'm going through...I'd like to see some opinions too...

**sourpuss** · 10-18-2010 09:38 AM

I think you'll both find that you'll be just fine. When you're with the right person, with the right communication, the sex only gets better and better.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 10-18-2010 04:14 PM

Good old Chemistry...

If you think about it, chemistry between people that is amazing, is usually only based on that, pure chemistry...

Perhaps, your both "settling", where relationships are concerned, wanting one, needing one, and chosing someone... Once together, there isn't much chemistry between you and so you have a "nice" person in your life, but not a good sex life.

And, same, perhaps your going for chemistry in other instances, therefore, it's fantastic, electrifying, but it doesn't last the distance because the other person has no feelings, just chemistry and you yourselves, know that the person isn't right for you, not enough in common, fight, what ever...

So, I think your question is, how can I have both?

I think sourpuss, well I know sourpuss's answer is the answer.

But how do you find that?

Suggestion is not to settle... Find the one that you have great laughter, communication, who has passion in life, interesting, and as you get to know "them" you'll see chemistry comes into it as well, all of a sudden they are the best looking person, and all of a sudden you want to engage in passionate sex, and then you'll have both, the person you fall for and the sex you crave for.

CW

**rhiannon34** · 10-18-2010 09:59 PM

I have been in this situation before, wondering if I could ever love that much again. The more time that passed the more I realized the relationship was not all it was cracked up to be. I still have contact with him and the feelings are totally gone, don't even know now what I was thinking. And I did love that much again, mabye even more. You just never know what life will bring you.

**Little_Miss_Me** · 10-19-2010 02:41 PM

Thanks for the reassurance!

**miva** · 11-14-2010 08:44 PM

I agree with both sourpuss and CW chemistry is the main thing. But if you find that he's not up to par with your standards, teach him.
Some of it is a natural knack and passion I'm sure but I've been in a similar situation and I've found that a good man will take the time to learn how to please you right.
And practise always makes perfect