Went on a great date and never heard back?

**dylan74** · 11-30-2010 12:09 PM

Ok. So I go on this terrific date with a woman who I had met online. We talked by emailing until the nt we met for drinks. I never asked for her number which she told me she liked when I met her. So we spend over four hours talking and laughing and having a incredible time. She even hinted about going out again early on. The first date could not have gone any better then it was. And I could tell on her end as well. So at the end of the date I walked her to the car and she gave a hug and said she had a great time, and I said i did as well. We both said that let's get together again. I told her why don't we chat tomorrow. She said sounds good. We both said as we were leaving; look foward to seeing you again. SO the next day I call and get a voicemail and leave a message. There was no message just an automated number. I said that it was me and called to say hi, and that I had a great time again last nt, and to just give me a call. I neverheard back from her, so I sent her and email and said hi, wasn't sure if you recieved my message. Just thought i would drop you a line. Let me know what works best for your schedule and we can make some plans. No response from that as well. Ok; please tell me what gives. I would appreciate a intelligent womans response to this. If someone would have told me that I would not have heard back from her again I'd think they were nuts. Should I call again? I called two days ago. Nothing? Please explain. Need some advice. We really did hit it off.

**caterpillar79** · 11-30-2010 12:30 PM

Give it another day or two, then call once more. If after that, she doesn't get back with you, hint, hint....move on.

There could be a lot of reasons and excuses) as to why she didn't get back sooner. Maybe she's also having doubts about herself/you; maybe she found you 'too good to be true'; she realized you're really a good man, but she hasn't really moved on from her bad break-up, etc.... A LOT of second-guessing.

Just give it time. Do not get stuck waiting for her reply. Go out and enjoy your time on your own or with friends, date more (wholesome, friendly dates).

**Beautiful Disaster** · 11-30-2010 02:14 PM

If it were me...I wouldn't contact her again. There could be lots of reasons why she enjoyed your company but doesn't want to go out with you again. Maybe she still has a thing for an ex and feels there may be too much baggage to get you involved. Maybe she didn't feel a sexual chemistry. Maybe it was the first time she met anyone online, and she's freaked out by it. Maybe she's just not wanting to seem overzealous, so she's giving it some time. Not saying any of these things are the case, just making the point that there are lots of reasons why she may not be interested. But if I called someone, left them a voicemail then emailed them and they didn't respond, I'd be quite sure they weren't interested.

Let her take the reigns at this point. If she isn't interested enough to contact you back when you made the first effort, then she's definitely not for you. You've told her three time (in person at the end of the date, on voicemail, and on email) that you want to see her again. You've done your due diligence. Move along..and if she contacts you and you're still interested, great.........if not, that means someone amazing is still out there waiting for you.

**Seeker_Advice** · 11-30-2010 02:19 PM

A fellow man's perspective....

Be patient my friend...and while you're waiting, go out with other women.

If it was meant to be, it will be.

**dylan74** · 11-30-2010 03:06 PM

Thanks so far to everyone's thoughts and advice. It is just frustating. I guess I am just burn't out on the whole dating thing. I don't want to meet someone at a bar, and as you get older it is hard to meet people. Not that I am old, but I am 36 years old, and have a good career going. I had to relocate two years ago with my job by myself out of state. Starting over and making new friends; going from a large city to medium size city where most of the people I have met as friends are either married or in a relationship. I have people ask me how are you still single? I get great compliments on my personality and looks and everything. My answer is; I would like to know that myself.

**caterpillar79** · 11-30-2010 03:28 PM

Just keep living your life as normal. When you don't really "look", she'll come. Patience...

As I usually advice single people, go out and have fun. Join some classes that might interest you, i.e. photography, martial arts, scuba diving, even getting a pilot license would be fun, travel out of the country, engage in some water sports, volunteer, etc.... Find a hobby, it doesn't matter if you share the same hobby with a married friend, or even an older co-worker, just enjoy your "singlehood" to the fullest. Once you're tied up, you'll have to do compromises, you'll have to consider your partner's take on everything, so while you can do stuff alone, enjoy it.

Do not let your lack of a GF affect your self-worth, it's not good. Find that confidence for yourself - within, not from outside.

Good luck, and keep us posted.

**dylan74** · 11-30-2010 03:46 PM

Thanks for the nice remarks. It is just hard sometimes. I have been single for almost two years now. I have my good days and bad. Not trying to feel sorry for myself. Just get's old.

**LanaBear** · 11-30-2010 03:59 PM

We all have good days and bad days, of course you are not feeling sorry for yourself. You just got to move forward. Like Cat said, when you're not really looking, she'll find you. You don't want to go into 'desperate' mode because she'll be able to sniff that a mile away. So just be yourself and be confident in who you are.

Stick around, there's many men here on the forum. We think it is great to have their opinions here too and sometimes opening up to people you don't know, helps.

**WildChild** · 11-30-2010 04:50 PM

Why not wait a couple weeks? In the mean time don't limit yourself. If an opportunity comes to go out, do it. She may just be caught up in holiday stuff right now.

**dylan74** · 11-30-2010 05:00 PM

That was one of the reason's I got on here, was to get a woman's perspective on this. It's nice to get opinions, thoughts and ideas from someone of the opposite sex.