Thread: You'll know why my boyfriend is defensive :C

Originally Posted by pixie8989

I know exactly where you are coming from, so I can relate to you easily! You will find it hard to keep shut about your insecurities but it does get easier.When you do, just try and think of things that make you laugh about your boyfriend and the reason you love him - he does love you, I just think he is just getting a bit sick of all the questions. Like mine was and I knew that I was pushing him away by doing so. Just be yourself with him, that is what he fell in love with!
I did read your post above about asking him questions about when he last watched porn etc etc... and he denies it. You know he does watch it so why do you need to ask? it'l save you the heartache of thinking about it - I used to have this problem too (think we are pretty similar!) but it doesn't bother me anymore, fair enough I don't like it but I can't control what he does when he's on his own -plus most of the girls in porn are dog awful anyway! lol.
Just try and keep happy and be happy in your relationship! Don't be too much of a drama queen either, men don't quite know how to handle it haha- me and my friend always laugh about stupid things we say when were making a deal out of nothing and we both know we shouldn't do it so tend to text each other when we think these stupid things and then tell each other to step away from the phone or something! lame I know but it works!!
I'm still insecure and probably always will be, I know I don't have any reason to be but it's just one of my traits that I am learning to deal with and you will too - just takes time! xx

Thank you pixie ( You just don't know how much you've helped me, I feel a lot better now and realized a lot of things. *hugs pixie*

Originally Posted by crissylynn

Although we get curious about whether our men are watching porn or not, bringing it up is going to cause him to get defensive. Cause as we all know masturbating is a private act and that's exactly what we want to keep it as. I'm not saying him lying about it is a good thing but he is probably just trying to save your feelings or prevent a fight. I'm not asking you to answer this but if you do masturbate, do you go and tell him all about it including what you thought about while you did it?

No, I won't tell him out of the blue that I did but if he asked, I'll let him know. I'm not stopping him from watching porn and stuff like that, but my point is that I just want him to be honest even in things that doesn't have to do anything with porn and guy stuff without being defensive.