What to do?

**apparantlyso** · 06-06-2011 08:06 PM

Hello,
I started dating a woman a couple weeks back. She is gorgeous, great fun to be with and love her company. However, she has a 2 year old son. This is not the drama as I love kids. But at the moment we are only seeing eachother on the weekends during the day when the father has the kid or weekends during the night if she can get a baby sitter.
I suggested grabbing some take out and a couple dvd's and just hanging out at her place so we can see eachother during the week and she doesn't need to worry about a baby sitter but she sort of blew it off and said she'd rather keep meeting up intown for the time being.
I'm not interested in a part time relationship and while I'm only seeing her on the weekend, it is eating at my time to go out with my mates and go fishing and camping which is what Id normally be doing.
I'm not sure if I am wasting my time with this girl, or she is just being over protective of her son which is why she doesn't want me over just yet.
Not sure whether to hang around or bite the look for a woman who isn't tied down with a child.
Any advice?

Thanks.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 06-07-2011 12:13 AM

Hi apparentlyso,

My opinion? It's only been two weeks, she has a two year old baby to consider and doesn't want that baby to get attached to a "daddy" figure unless she knows for sure that it will work between the pair of you, and the baby won't be affected. It's alot to consider and in my opinion she's being a great Mum.

Also, it's only been two weeks, she also probably got burnt I mean the baby is two years old and the father is not on the scene in "her" life, perhaps her sons but not hers, so she probably also wants to take her time, not jump into things, make sure that you two are falling in love.

Be patient.

It's not being over protective it's being protective of her heart, herself and her son..

Why do you want to jump so fast? You also need to be sure that this person develops "as it should slowly" into a relationship, not just date and say phew I am now in a relationship.

CW

**WildChild** · 06-07-2011 12:29 AM

I agree with CW, no good parent, mother or father, is going to let someone they have just started seeing into their child's space that quickly.
If you really want to see her and develop a relationship you will have to honor this and find some other ways to spend time with your mates.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 06-10-2011 04:44 PM

bumping

**JadedQueen** · 06-19-2011 05:25 PM

I can't agree more with the advice that has been given. When you enter into a relationship with someone that has a child(ren) you have to be willing to handle things that is in the best interest of the child(ren) involved, if you aren't prepared to do that then perhaps you should date women that don't have children.

You can't even begin to imagine the damage it would do to a child to get attached to someone and have them disappear from their lives if things with the Mother don't work out. The Woman is being a wonderful Mom and protecting her son the way all Mother's should. If you aren't willing to taking those things into consderation then the Woman you are referring to then it's apparent that you aren't in it for the long haul or prepared to enter into a relationship with a woman that has a child. I realize that it's very early on in the relationship but this woman and her son are a package deal and if you aren't ready for all that it entails realizing that the sooner the better for all parties involved.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 06-22-2011 03:15 AM

Aparently so when people no longer reply

Then they tend to agree with the posters that have written so how do you feel about that, what else can we offer to you?

**Seeker_Advice** · 06-22-2011 07:31 AM

You're not dating a woman...you've had a couple of dates with the same woman....over a couple of weeks (weekends only).

Another way to look at it...You might be dating a "package deal" if it goes forward from just a couple of dates to something more.

Remember, you are second, her toddler is first, now and always. If you're not ready to accept that then move on before real emotions get involved.

I didn't introduce my children to my SO for almost ten weeks...and they were teenagers at the time.

Be patient.

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