Thread: my boyfriends exs are HOT!

he is 25 and im 20, so hes had much more experience with both dating and sex. hes seriously dated 6 or 7 people, and ive only seriously dated 3 or 4 others. hes also slept with 9 people including me, and ive only slept with 3 including him. so thinking of him with all those other women really drives me nuts too, and i cant seem to stop the thoughts. i know hes had more time on this earth so it is standard that he has experienced more things, but i still dont like it. i just wish we were on the same level so i didnt feel so bad. if i had slept with a few more people or he had slept with a few less, i think i would feel like we're on the same playing field. but again, i dont know why that matters to me. he loves me, i love him...why do i let this other stuff get in the way?

Do you have confidence in your relationship? Do you trust him? Everything you said screams insecurity. So what if his past girlfriends were super hot? He is with you, he chose YOU. If I dated a guy that was previously with a supermodel, I wouldn't care, because there would obviously be something he saw in me that the supermodel lacked. Let me tell you something... the way you feel about someone, THEM as a person, enhances their physical attractiveness in your eyes. This is how your boyfriend sees you, being beautiful because of who you are more so than how you look. You have something that his past girlfriends didn't have, that made him fall in love with you. Have confidence in that, and nothing else will matter.

i do have confidence in my relationship. i dont want to sound stupid, but i really do know how much he loves me and i KNOW he will never leave me. and i love him too and want to be with him forever. and yes, youre right about how you feel about someone enhancing their beauty. that did make me feel better, thank you. i know most of this is my own insecurity. it just bugs me that there have been SO many other women and that a lot of them are much prettier than me. just makes me feel bad about myself, even though it shouldnt, because he chose me. i guess i just worry that maybe he compares my physical traits to theirs in his head (even though im a far better girlfriend, partner, and woman). stupid, i know, but this is how my brain works lol

Well, I can bet you that if he does compare, he is NOT comparing looks but rather all the things he loves about you that his past girlfriends lacked. The fact that you think these girls are prettier than you is only your opinion, and yours alone. If he loves you like you say he does, then I'll bet he would disagree with you, and tell you that you are the the sexiest, most beautiful woman he's ever had the pleasure to call his girlfriend (or something to that effect).

How did you end up seeing pictures of his ex? A little advice for the future. Its, in my opinion, best to keep those ex files closed. Don't ask to see pics of exes, don't ask what they looked like, don't ask how much he loved them, don't ask who left who, how many he had, who was his favorite before you, who was best in bed -- just leave it be. He had a past, its a past for a reason. Don't compare yourself to exes because its apples and oranges, you are you, they are them -- and you will never see in yourself what others see in you, its just too hard.

A girl can be beautiful in a picture and ugly to the core on the inside and believe me, there is only so much you can tolerate of someone who the only thing you like about them is their appearance. Its the personality that ppl fall in love, looks attract, but chemistry, respect and friendship are what keeps or what that lack of will cause to seperate.

If he is the one bringing up his exes, just act disinterested in anything he has to say about them, eventually he will get the hint. If he doesn't... politely tell him that you'd rather not focus on the past. And change the subject, not aggressively, just matter of factly.

We'd like to pretend we were the first girl our guy ever laid eyes on, or the last, or the only... but what matters is that we're the one they choose to lay eyes on the most of all The fact you think his exes are pretty, let that comfort you rather than intimidate you, realize that you fall into a higher class of hot than you originally thought