Thread: Am I a bunny boiler?! Honest objective opinions wanted!

Sorry this is so long but can someone please restore my sanity!
Two years ago I started being pursued by a man at work. I fell for him very quickly and as ridiculous as it sounds, I actually felt as though I had met my true match. Then I found out he was in a relationship at the time (for 7 years) but he told me he felt as though meeting me had changed everything for him. He pursued me despite still being with her, sending me messages telling me I was beautiful, like he'd met an angel and that he'd never felt like this about anyone. Despite all of this he stayed with her and I felt he was playing with my feelings; by this point I had changed jobs and told him not to contact me anymore if he was still with her as it wasn't fair to anyone.
We didn't see eachother for several months but stayed in touch via messages/calls. He always told me he missed me but often the conversation would become sexual which I wasn't that comfortable with because I'd end up feeling like some premium rate sex line and wondering if that was all he wanted. I don't mean to sound big-headed because I'm really nothing special, but supposedly at work I was considered the most attractive one in the office (it was mainly young men, few women so I didn't have much competition) and I know a lot of the men were quite lusty towards me, this guy included.
Often I would ignore his calls and messages but he would text me relentlessly if I didn't reply "Why aren't you replying? Have I annoyed you" etc, that sort of thing. Sometimes I was very cool with him because I found it a bit full-on.
About six months ago he broke things off with her. He arranged to see me not long afterwards but I could tell by his behaviour that it was too soon for him to be dating again. The next day he went cold again and after two weeks, he had started seeing her again.
Once again I was left feeling as though I had been messed around and found myself having to get over him again. I got into a new relationship but when that broke up, we got back in contact again. He was no longer with his ex and said that it was definitely over. He started again saying he wanted to see me, he missed me, he hated thinking of me with someone else etc. I was reluctant to get involved with him and told him as much, as he wasn't that long single and may be enjoying the 'single life', but I decided to give it another chance. As I said, for some reason I actually felt as though this guy was 'the one'.
We started dating for several weeks and eventually slept together- he would have slept with me after the first date, which again raised my fears that was all he was after. With this in mind, we had a conversation where I told him I really didn't want to be messed around; I told him I didn't want to be just a sideline sex thing if he didn't see this going anywhere and, again, I said if he was enjoying the 'single life' then he should tell me that now. The next day he texted me in a really cold way(not called- texted, in the middle of the day while I was at work) and said we shouldn't see each other anymore "It's not you, I just don't want a relationship." I asked him why he had bothered hooking up with me again then and he said "I wanted to make sure I knew how I felt about things"- regardless of how I would feel, obviously.
Obviously I was a bit heartbroken because, once again, I felt like he had messed with my mind and feelings. We spoke a bit in the week but he was really off with me, like I'd done something really awful. I didn't contact him for over a week after that but it was driving me nuts how he had gone from literally behaving as though he was in love with me to not wanting to know anymore. So, to my shame, I messaged him on Iphone Whatsapp (where you can see when the person has read their messages). I sent him probably four messages saying, I don't understand why you're treating me as if I've done something wrong, I don't want us to not be friends etc. He then replied "I think it's for the best that we don't as I don't want you to fall for me again and to be honest you're behaving a bit odd. You're actually freaking me out a bit."
I was so offended, particularly given the way he has behaved in the past with his relentless messaging which bordered on stalkerish. I apologised for freaking him and out and said that I got the hint and would not be bothering him again. He replied, "Don't be so overdramatic. Night night X" ????! The reason I mentioned earlier about me being the 'attractive one' at work is because sometimes I feel as though he gets a bit of a thrill out of me being so wrapped up in him (as he is not what one would call conventionally attractive, although I found him to be very attractive) and likes to play these games with me as he gets a kick out of it.
This morning I have woken up feeling like a complete idiot; I feel so embarrassed that I have behaved like one of THOSE girls i.e bunny boiler types and that I 'freaked him out'. I would really appreciate an objective opinion on this situation, was I being a bit psycho messaging him or is he once again messing with my emotions?
My biggest problem in this situation is that I am still in love with him... Please give me some advice!