http://www.womens-health.com/boards/ en Sat, 21 Nov 2009 00:07:21 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.womens-health.com/boards/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.womens-health.com/boards/ http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/20022-abused-women-diaries.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 12:34:43 GMT This isn't spam, i just started a blog where i post abused womens words. From diary written passages, to cry anonymously. I started this blog because i personally wanted a place to anonymously write a passage from my diary, so my husband couldn't track back, and just let someone have the opportunity to relate.

Please if you keep a journal, or would like to post a passage anonymously about things you usually can't share with the people around you, make an anonymous post on
(EDITED)

Emotional abuse, is abuse also. I just wanted a place to share for my sake and others. No need to reply in this post, i hope this can be a good thing. :o ]]> Relationships TheBlackCat http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/20022-abused-women-diaries.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19981-suggestions-building-new-relationships.html Thu, 19 Nov 2009 17:32:01 GMT I've been trying to think of somethings I might want to try in order to meet some new people, just in general. I am constantly making new friends, but they tend to branch off of a few close friends. The problem is that my time is very limited with work and school so it'd have to be something that doesn't involve a HUGE commitment, maybe once every few weeks/once a month.

I know the holidays are coming up, but does anyone have any suggestions? I'm starting Zumba on Saturday but not sure I'm going to have much time to talk to people while we're dancing our tails off :)

Note: this doesn't mean I dislike my friends or have issues with my friends, I just want to branch out and find some new interests and people to get to know. ]]> Relationships kygirl http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19981-suggestions-building-new-relationships.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19947-tired-waiting.html Wed, 18 Nov 2009 20:42:35 GMT It will be 9 years together for me and my boyfriend on November 20th, 8 1/2 years spent living together.

Over the years there have been good times and bad. We have had alot of bad times we have tried to get over.

At 9 years, our communication suffers. I feel as though we have become enemies.

He is an alcoholic and I have hoped that it would get better but it has just gotten worse.

He has now started gambling. I dont work, I am a student. He has just purchased a new home and its beautiful. I thought that this might change some of his behaviours but it hasnt.

We split up for about 4 months and in that time we dated a bit while living apart.

He promised things would change if I and when I moved into this new home. I find that things have gotten worse steadily. He spends alot of time at this pub he has been going to for about 15 years.

He gets very intoxicated and flirts alot. He almost always makes an fool of himself and has occasionally fallen asleep at the bar.

On the other hand he doesnt do this everyday and he can be the sweetest guy in the world.

I have turned into a completely different person over the years. I have become bitter, angry and impatient with these continued behaviours. I immediately get angry when the words "Im going out with my friends tonight, you are welcome to join" start to leave his mouth.

This happens every weekend. He always finds a way to make me feel like it is my fault, when I confront him with everything. He just gets angry and then seems to come up with an answer for everything.

He took me to look at engagement rings finally about 2 years ago and when I didnt see even a payment being made after 3 months I asked him and He looked at me and said "Im not sure anymore if you are the one". Which I forgot to mention that that line has been made famous in our relationship and me and his mother laugh about it all the time.

I met him a year into his breakup with his former girlfriend of 6 1/2 years, whom he never asked to marry him either. Which should have been a warning sign for me.

I loved him so much that I kept telling myself that things will get better. Well things have stayed the same and gotten worse in some cases. I am not innocent in this whole sinario. After the revoke on the engagement I seemed to emotionally distance myself and along the way I met someone else, whom I spent the night with. There was no sex, just talking and a bit of making out. Of course alcohol was involved. He just made me feel good.

I was the one girl in the bar that night that he would not leave be. He made me feel attractive again. I didnt feel fat as my boyfriend has always done. I felt beautiful for one night. My boyfriend is supportive up to a point in everything I do. School and whatever else I might want to pursue. He makes sure I have a vehicle and I have money if I am without. Its like he tries to make me feel comfortable but at the same time I feel controlled by this.

We have watched all of our friends get married, engaged, or have children over the years. Some have been together the same amount of time as us and some have been together as litle as 6 months. I guess Im hoping that someone out there has been in or seen this same senario and can offer some good advice.

Sorry for the very long thread, but I wanted my situation to be pretty clear. The time line might be a bit off but its the jist of it anyway. ]]> Relationships AllieKat http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19947-tired-waiting.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19944-how-do-i-stop-thinking-about-him.html Wed, 18 Nov 2009 19:02:00 GMT I just recently broke up with my boyfriend of four and a half months. It is complicated but he broke it off. I'm just starting this thread so I don't back out for some stupid reason later on but will updated it better later on. Because I do need some advise here. I don't know how to get through this. I'm not sure what anyone can tell me here. People say it just takes time. :(

But I can't stop thinking about him. I have been going to single events about three times a week just to get out of the house but when I'm not, I'm thinking about him. Or even when I'm at those events, I find myself wishing I was there with him instead. :( It is obviously not doing me any good. Any little thing sets off memories of him and it hurts so much. :(

I originally started a thread on the lounge area of this board when I was still with him. Here is the link. http://www.womens-health.com/boards/...t-turn-me.html

I'm not looking for help here on the sex issues. That I'll continue to get through with the friends I have met on the other section. But here I'm trying to just get some advise on how to get over him.

I have to get going right now and I know I haven't told you much of anything here. I'll fill you in better later on. The background is all in the lounge thread but I don't expect you to spend your afternoon reading through it. But if you have nothing else to do, it is there for you to read. ]]> Relationships Amber http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19944-how-do-i-stop-thinking-about-him.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19911-i-feel-like-im-drifting-away-my-best-friend.html Tue, 17 Nov 2009 14:34:48 GMT So Amber and I have been friends since we were about 16, we're now 24. Throughout the years, we have always been great friends, best friends really. We had so much in common, always hung out together, had a great time together, could talk about anything. I introduced her to her now husband, and stood up in their wedding 3 years ago. We've all gotten along great and often took camping vacations together, and spent almost every weekend together.

Problem is, I feel like we're drifting away from each other now. We stayed close even though we went to different colleges, and now that we've both graduated, things have changed. Her life hasn't gone as planned and I think she resents me for the great things that have happened to me recently. I feel like she's trying to compete with me and take me down a peg or two every time we are together, and i HATE that!

She got her BS in Sociology, which is a difficult major to find jobs in in our area. Its even worse because she didn't have a very good GPA and she didn't do any internships because they were unpaid so potential employers are not impressed with her lack of experience. She's unemployed, working odd jobs here and there, and struggling to even be asked in for an interview for any jobs she applies for. Her husband has a steady job in a factory that pays the bills, but doesn't offer a lot of opportunities for promotions. They barely get by paying bills and have had to really REALLY cut back. They also live in Amber's sister-in-law's apartment complex where they get a deal on rent so they can afford it, but unfortunately Amber's in laws are kind of crazy and she's stuck living with all of them in the same building (different apartments). Obviously frustrating. She's been very depressed and basically gave up trying to get jobs, and sits at home all day drinking a case of beer and watching TV. That's it. Her husband comes home and finds the place a mess, and gets frustrated with her because she's stopped looking for jobs altogether and does nothing around their home. Now they are having marital problems.. she's facing a possible divorce from her husband. Horrible, and worst timing EVER right???

I, on the other hand, got my BS in International Business Operations and Finance, and worked at two global companies as a lowly intern for 3 years. I found a great job that I love about 2 months before I graduated through a networking even one of my internship employers hosted. The company has been great to me for the (almost) two years I've been with it. I bought a lovely house this summer at a great price. My boyfriend and I live together at my house, we've been together for 8 years and are still going strong. We're talking about marriage in the future, but neither one of us are in a hurry. We're happy with what we're doing now. I'm not living the dream by any means, but I'm definitely comfortable.

I can tell that Amber is irritated by my situation. She gives my grief for being "handed" my job because of my "connections" at the university I went to. When I bought my house, she came to look at it and had not one good thing to say.. comments like, "uh what an ugly floor" and "OMG, they advertised that as a bedroom? thats no more than a walk in closet" are all I heard. She tells me that Matt and I are doomed because who in their right mind doesnt get married after 8 years (helllllooo we started dating when I was 16.. 2 years of highschool and 4 years of college needed to be under my belt first before I even thought of getting married!). She tells me that I can't cook as well as she can.... She even criticizes my DOG for goodness sake...

I try to be understanding! I encourage her, I take all her calls when she needs to vent about her inlaws or money trouble! I wrote her resume and cover letter for her job hunt, I take her out for a drink when she needs to get out of her apartment. I've never once "rubbed it in her face" that my situation is better than hers right now. I'm TRYING to be a good friend! But I'm getting sooooooo sick of being belittled all the time because I have things that she's struggling to get. When she calls to vent, and I sympathize with her, she feels better and then starts harping on me about how I don't get it because I've never had to struggle. Its like she's making me feel guilty for being successful. It's becoming a one-sided friendship, and I'm finding myself taking less and less of her calls.. I'm not trying to get her out of her house anymore... I'm not calling around to companies for her anymore... I'm pulling away. And I feel like a huge jerk for it!


What can I do to fix this? How do I help her? How do I get over my feelings of resentment towards her for being so lousy to me when I know its just her being down on herself that causes her comments? OMG.. its so frustrating! ]]> Relationships KMonte85 http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19911-i-feel-like-im-drifting-away-my-best-friend.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19897-just-cant-forget.html Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:34:04 GMT Firstly, i would like to apologize in advance cos i know this post will be a long one. But i really need a place to.. i guess 'vent' is the word after having all this bottled up inside me for so long, and i would really appreciate your help or just your opinion. It's driving me crazy. Feel free to skip bits, i'm sure you will, as long as you get the idea and understand what i'm trying to get through.

Phew...ok,
Well it's very easy to judge me too soon for what i'm about to say but please hear me out. My partner and i met on a social networking sight last year. Absolutely nothing i'd ever considered before and this wasn't planned. We had a conversation about music and from there we became friends. We'd speak to eachother for hours everyday and of course i really started to fall for him.

One day, he announced he had a girlfriend. Not when we started talking, but at that point. So yeah, i was like 'ow', then he dropped another bombshell.. She lives in Australia (we live in england) and they've never even met -they 'met' over the same site. Then another bombshell.. 'I'd really like for the two of you to be friends'. Bloody heck. Anyway, i added her to my profile and, for him, i made the effort to talk to her and take an interest, even though it pained me. This time it was her turn to drop the bombshells. 'He just can't stop telling me how much he loves me, i love him so much too'. What the heck? As far as i knew they'd only been going out for like two weeks, when the heck did love come into it? Then it got worse. 'He's moving to Australia next year to be with me'. What the h*ll???

Anyway, trying my hardest to shorten the story down, a few months later i got drunk (ever the cliche expert) and called him telling him i'd fallen for him. From what i remember he was quite shocked and then.. well next thing i knew my head was in the toilet.
After that phone call his attitude with me changed. He basically showed a complete lack of respect for this (annoyingly nice) Aussie lady and well, to me too.

A couple of more months past and they split up. I hate to say it, but i was kind of happy. Just because i had wanted this man for months and as far as i knew he was moving to the other side of the planet. But then about two weeks later (on New Years Eve, would you believe it), i excitedly checked his page and was literally stunned to see his relationship status had changed from 'single', along with his profile picture which was now him with his arms around some woman! Talk about a fast-mover!

I was really hurt cos we had been through a lot by that point (which i won't go into cos i really need your help, not for you to decide this is all and go somewhere else) and he'd been really distant, i guess cos he had his woman, why would he keep in touch with me? We didn't speak for a while until one day this February he called me out of the blue and told me him and his latest girlfriend had split up. How convenient, huh? Anyways, we grew close again and i remembered why i had let him treat me so badly in the first place, because i loved him so much.

By this time i was working/living in the Isle of Wight, while he had his place in Yorkshire. For my 20th birthday in April, he drove all the way (and took a 45min ferry ride) all the way from his to mine. Anyone from England will understand how far that is. This was to be the first time we had ever met in person and, honestly, it was absolutely amazing. I will never forget it. Such a romantic place and we were so smitten and comfortable with eachother straight away -i've never felt able to completely relax and be myself around anyone before, you would never have believed we had only just met, it was incredible.

After a week, it was time for him to go back home and, seriously, we were both near tears and we felt like we had known eachother years. Then he asked me to come back with him. I thought back to the first second i opened the door and saw him standing there, i'd had this over-whelming feeling, like 'oh my god i'm going to cry myself to death with love and happiness' (i may have pinched that from somewhere, i apologize, but it expresses it exactly). I said i would and within the hour, i'd quit my job and was saying my goodbyes to my friends and my workmates.

I'd planned to move in with my brother in Birmingham til i got back on my feet (only about 2hrs from Y'shire) so he took me back there. Again, we couldn't bear to be separated so we got a hotel and he took another four days off work.

We eventually spent five days apart and he drove down to see me again. This time i went back to his place and ended up staying there. It's been seven months now and things aren't much different from the day i moved in. We're still happy, healthy sex life, we're even engaged now (i promise i'm not bragging, we all drop a bombshell in this story!).. but there's just one thing..

I can't forget the past. Last year, and early this year, i had to see his web page covered in messages from these two girlfriends he had, hearing all about how inlove he was... but if he spoke so passionately (to everyone) of his love for the Australian, how he was planning to move to the otherside of the planet for her, then two weeks later the same passion for another woman.. how do iknow it's different with me? When he says he loves me, how can i believe it? Would he still 'love' me if i didn't love him? What makes me so special.

I did ask him about this once and of course he got all defensive and angry. But then when i reasoned with him he calmed down and explained that, yes, before he was just desperate to be loved and would've settled for anybody but apparantly he's really fallen for me and this time it's different. But how the h*ll can i believe that?

How am i supposed to believe that i'm not just second (or third) best, just the booby prize?? He's asked me to marry him, sure, but he's been engaged twice before.. His best friend 'jokingly' asked me when i first met him 'has he proposed to you yet?'
I just can't forget everything that happened last year, it's driving me crazy! Not usually the jealous type either but when i think about it or see his old comments on his web pics 'i love you more, baby' i just want to scream with rage and jealousy, like 'he's MY man! F off!!' I see comments where he's saying the same things to them as he's now saying to me! I hate it!!

What do you guys and girls think (if anyone continued to read, i hope so. Thank you so much if you did)? Do you think it's real, or do you think he's still just desperate for anyone? It hurts me so much even being like this, let alone having the whole thing shoved in my face everyday.

How would you deal with it? What's your opinion?
Please help me ]]> Relationships Melephant http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19897-just-cant-forget.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19895-no-one-ever-said-life-fair.html Tue, 17 Nov 2009 02:32:46 GMT ..but no-one told me it could be this (EDIT) up either.

It wouldn't be right if people could have everything. The world would be more of a (edit) than it is already and people would be even bigger w*nkers than they already are. Life would be boring and we could never really appreciate what we have.

But when you've spent a big chunk of your life suffering, every night crying yourself to the point of exhaustion, having to be literally dragged out of bed even on christmas day, countless nights spent just staring at the ceiling in a daze, wishing to God with everything that you have that you could just have SOMEBODY to love you.

Family love you've never felt, friends just take what they can get then fade away. All you want is to feel capable of love, spend even a day feeling human, not numb. Have somebody there to come home to, to wrap your arms around, to feel their heart beat, to know that they love you as much as you love them.

Then one day, when you're at the lowest you've been in years, ready to just drift away from your life like anyone you've ever cared about has done to you before, you meet someone who is even more perfect than anyone you could ever have dreamt up. Genuine, honest, faithful, funny, loving. Perfect.

Knowing that this incredible person loves you just as much as you love them, knowing your life would be nothing without that person in it, never having felt so much emotion for someone like this. Never believing anyone before when they tell you you are beautiful, that you are a good person, that you are good enough, that you are strong enough to face anything that is thrown at you. Learning to appreciate who you are and all the years of that you have suffered.

You would sacrifice anything to spend your life with this person and you do. Giving up your job, your home, your social life.. Moving to literally the otherside of the country.

Now your life is the complete opposite of what it was. You don't have a job, everyone you know is miles away, you feel a bit useless and lazy struggling to get a job, make friends, have something to do during the day other than clean the house and wait for the person you worship to come back home to you.

Only now, you have that person in your life. You have a reason to wake up everyday, just so you can look over in the morning and see them lying next to you. So you can spend the day with them, so you can enjoy life, your life with them. Your relationship is perfect and you would give up everything all over again for this person, if you had to, if they asked. But, really, what's it all worth?

Everyday you are feeling more and more worthless. Six months have passed and still you can't find a job, you feel asthough you are 'spongeing', taking advantage of that person. You start to lack the motivation to do anything, then you start to lack the energy. You get lonely during your partner's long shifts at work and have no-one to talk to, nothing to do. You start to feel worthless, lose your self-respect, constantly feel guilty, unmotivated, useless. You may start questioning what is best for this person who you worship so much. Surely it would be better if you left them? Both of you would be devastated, it would take probably forever for you to get over eachother. But you would be able to get your lives back on track. Would you do it? Would that be the right thing to do? Let's face it, either way you're going to suffer, hate yourself.

All the sacrifices would've been for nothing. All the promises would have been meaningless, fade away like everything else. But maybe that person you love and worship so much would be better off, eventually. Though they wouldn't see it at the time.

How do you know what's right? Do you follow your head or your heart?
Maybe giving up the one thing that makes you happy is the final sacrifice.

True love (and i can't stress that enough), or self-worth and stability? ]]> Relationships MrsDeadCeleb http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19895-no-one-ever-said-life-fair.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19888-husband-texts-i-love-you-too-another-woman.html Tue, 17 Nov 2009 00:54:49 GMT Hi everyone and thanks in advance for any advice:)

My husband ran into an old fling from college about a few months ago. He came and told me he was upset because she was "stalking" him after a few emails and she was posting on his Facebook (and he wanted me to know).

Some stalker? Hum. Well, I found that they were calling eachother and I said, "I thought she was bi-polar and you said stalking you..so why are you two talking on the phone?" He said she'd calmed down and was OK...and had "calmed down"...

Then,, I found the Text message where she was going to meet a man she wanted to maybe date and was asking his advice.

Her: Yeah, remember when I had this talk about you?
Him: You can trust me ..go meet him, you seem to like him...
Her...Smiles, I love you.
Him: I love you too. (Wink)
Her: Call me when you leave work.
Him: OK, will do.

????
I've never seen him say to use the word "Love" with another woman, and why all the lies about her being "a stalker" when he still talks to her, by text and phone?

Am I reading too much into this?

Thanks. ]]> Relationships irishbynature65 http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19888-husband-texts-i-love-you-too-another-woman.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19881-recently-found-out-my-finacee-unfaithful-lied-me.html Mon, 16 Nov 2009 18:57:08 GMT Need some major help, my fiancee of 4+ years (engaged for 1) recently admitted to being unfaithful with a guy she works(ed) with. She claims that it started in February with him hitting on her (telling her she is hot, that he wants her, etc.) and that it ended in late June or early July (she cant quite remember...right). To make matters worse, this is the guy she was seeing 4 years ago when we got together, but ended it to be with me.

I have asked a million questions, and she claims she isnt lying, but during this time she lied to me about other stuff consistently. So I already feel insecure about what she tells me. Then she let the cat out of the bag that this was happening. She claims that from Feb to late May, she wasnt interested back, and that it was just him hitting on her, but she wouldnt say/do anything back. Then in late May until the beginning of July, she said she started to feel attracted back and began flirting (telling him she wants him, he's hot, etc.) back.

She is adamant that all that ever happened was saying things like that, he would slap her behind, hugging, an occasional kiss on the cheek, hanging out on breaks, a few text messages, and flirting back when she hadnt before. But she didnt stop it from happening, instead she said that for 3.5 months she would never say anything back, just say "thanks" or walk away. And then the last month she felt attracted back and began returning the gestures.

I dont know what to really believe, I love this girl with all my heart and want nothing more than to be with her, but at the same time; she always made me feel like she was the most faithful, trusting person Ive met/been with. She was even really paranoid about me doing these type of things when I wasnt, making it seem more so that she would never do those things to me if she was worried about them.

I want to believe that nothing else like sex or kissing happened, which she says never ever did, and she wouldnt. But why would it go on for so long? She said she felt bad and liked the attention he gave her more, but still came home to me everyday and told me that she loved me, etc. and acted like nothing was going on. I so hurt and confused, up until now, I never would have thought her to be like this, and she claims she never has before and regrets it alot. At the same time, I feel like I dont know if she is lying to me about the actual details of what happened cuz she lied to me about another situation (not cheating) for months before telling me the truth, and I was upset the whole time...said she lied cuz she didnt want to hurt me. Now says she never stopped loving me, always wanted to be with me, and that she cant believe she acted that way (everything she was paranoid about)....but how could it have gone on that long, and nothing else happened. I dont want to think this way, but I love her so much, but my heart also tells me I am probably being niave, and that more than what she said did happen.

Going crazy, cant stop thinking about it...and the fact that she let it go on for so long...even if she only said stuff back at the end for a month and then told him to leave her alone because she was starting to feel something for him, and didnt want to because she loved me, so she told him to back off.

Am I incredibly stupid? Maybe she is telling the truth? I dont know what to believe!!?!?!? ]]> Relationships chaosphynx http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19881-recently-found-out-my-finacee-unfaithful-lied-me.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19811-should-i-stay-should-i-go.html Sat, 14 Nov 2009 13:44:37 GMT Ok well i have been with my bf for 2.5 years we have had our bumps but we have been working on them. For the last year i have been supporting him finacially and it has taken a toll on me i have had my hair fall out my anxiety came back full force and i have gained 30pounds. He has been looking for jobs has had a couple but they either down size cuz of the economy or its due to it being a temp job. So now its the end of the year and our lease for our apartment is up december 31st and i have no clue and i mean no clue what to do. Money is super tight. I know i can afford to live on my own but i can not afford to have him live with me. I have never lived on my own i have always had roommates since i moved out of my moms house at 17yrs old. Im starting to think its time for me to have time to myself and really live an independent life. I know by telling him this he is gonna think i wanna break up but i dont but he will not let go of that once i tell him how i feel. I still love him deeply i just need to do for me now because im always doing things for others. So im hoping he will understand. Ok well i have been with my bf for 2.5 years we have had our bumps but we have been working on them. For the last year i have been supporting him finacially and it has taken a toll on me i have had my hair fall out my anxiety came back full force and i have gained 30pounds. He has been looking for jobs has had a couple but they either down size cuz of the economy or its due to it being a temp job. So now its the end of the year and our lease for our apartment is up december 31st and i have no clue and i mean no clue what to do. Money is super tight. I know i can afford to live on my own but i can not afford to have him live with me. I have never lived on my own i have always had roommates since i moved out of my moms house at 17yrs old. Im starting to think its time for me to have time to myself and really live an independent life. I know by telling him this he is gonna think i wanna break up but i dont but he will not let go of that once i tell him how i feel. I still love him deeply i just need to do for me now because im always doing things for others. So im hoping he will understand. ]]> Relationships LOVE_RAYNE http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19811-should-i-stay-should-i-go.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19791-cant-stand-roommate-friends-problem.html Fri, 13 Nov 2009 19:38:20 GMT My boyfriend and a guy friend of ours started renting our house almost 2 years ago. We all made our agreements on quite a few topics. One thing has always been no smoking in the house....and it's not cigarettes, he smokes weed. He stopped for quite some time, only because he was on probation for getting caught elsewhere. He just finished probation maybe a month or 2 ago, and started up again that weekend. Anyways, he's been doing it more and more at home. He will only do it in his room, and he shoves a towel at the bottom of the door so I can't smell it...but I can. It travels across the hall to my room, and I can even smell it downstairs sometimes. Since it's getting cold here, the heat circulates it throughout the house sometimes too. It frustrates me even more that some of his friends come over and bring random people and they all go in his room and do it. I've tried communicating with him in a nice way, hey please don't smoke in the house. I always get an OK, or I know. This past week it has been aggravating me so much I through a cuss word or two in there. I'll either say something in person, yell through the door, or text him. He's gotten to the point where he lies he'll say "I/we're not smoking" or "I don't even have any". It's like he doesn' care and has no respect anymore.
Lastly, I also have a parrot. It's not that strong of a smell that reaches downstairs, but it can cause depression and other issues in parrots. Also, smelly good things like candles and scented sprays are really bad for parrots, actually the #3 thing that kills them. I've used them in moderation, and don't use them directly around him. However, our roommate keeps taking the spray for the bathroom after a #2 (haha) and completely saturates his room, then once again it goes in the hallway, downstairs, etc. It's one thing you're tryin to cover up the smell, it's another when I'm choking on flowery scents downstairs, which could kill my beloved parrot.
I'm asking for help. I have no idea what to do. He obviously doesn't listen, he lies when it's obvious he is. I've tried telling my boyfriend to say something to him, but he looks at it as "please stop so she will shut up about it" , and doesn't take it seriously, probably because I try to keep my cool when I explain it to him but I can't take it anymore.
Sorry this is so long, but any help is appreciated. I feel partially like a prisoner in my own home. ]]> Relationships jnd2009 http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19791-cant-stand-roommate-friends-problem.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19762-im-trying-find-place-fit.html Thu, 12 Nov 2009 23:31:48 GMT I am a recoving drug addict, i know that those few words will scare most of you away. I am ok with that. i have been in recovery for 4 years and six months. Very proud of that fact. i had lost my children to my parents due to my drug addiction and once i got clean i have a good relationship with the girl (i have twins one boy and one girl) They are 16. Anyway my daughter and i a great relationship even though they live in Texas and i live in Ca. so long story short, i could use some others who have been or are in a similar situation. Thank you fore letting me share. I am a recoving drug addict, i know that those few words will scare most of you away. I am ok with that. i have been in recovery for 4 years and six months. Very proud of that fact. i had lost my children to my parents due to my drug addiction and once i got clean i have a good relationship with the girl (i have twins one boy and one girl) They are 16. Anyway my daughter and i a great relationship even though they live in Texas and i live in Ca. so long story short, i could use some others who have been or are in a similar situation. Thank you fore letting me share. ]]> Relationships serineandfree http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19762-im-trying-find-place-fit.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19748-dilemma.html Thu, 12 Nov 2009 16:13:07 GMT I have been with guys now for five and a half year, he asked me to marry him a year and a half ago. Two weeks ago I gave him the ring back and told him I was tired of friends asking me when is the big date or jocking still no date. At that time all my intension was to see if he wants to set a date or not. After arguments and discussions I got the following reasons: he has been forced to get maried the first time, we have communication issue, I am the love of his life but he is not ready for marriage, I have a son I need to raise and he is not ready to become a stepfather. We did not broke up, but I am not sure what to do, do I wait for him to be ready or just get rid of him? He recommended to live together as a test to see if we all get along. Please help figure this out! I have been with guys now for five and a half year, he asked me to marry him a year and a half ago. Two weeks ago I gave him the ring back and told him I was tired of friends asking me when is the big date or jocking still no date. At that time all my intension was to see if he wants to set a date or not. After arguments and discussions I got the following reasons: he has been forced to get maried the first time, we have communication issue, I am the love of his life but he is not ready for marriage, I have a son I need to raise and he is not ready to become a stepfather. We did not broke up, but I am not sure what to do, do I wait for him to be ready or just get rid of him? He recommended to live together as a test to see if we all get along.
Please help figure this out! ]]> Relationships m1965m http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19748-dilemma.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19724-uh-oh.html Thu, 12 Nov 2009 05:14:42 GMT Okay so me & my ex-boyfriend broke up about 2 months ago. He is seeing someone, but he sends me dirty pictures so I sent a few back :confused: Am I wrong for doing that?? ]]> Relationships escape me http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19724-uh-oh.html http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19701-do-i-love-her.html Wed, 11 Nov 2009 19:00:46 GMT Hello ladies, I'm back with another emotional problem.
So, I've been together with a girl for about 30 months. We had our ups and downs, even "broke up" a few times and got back together. Now it's been about 5-6 months since we broke up and during this time I had a different girlfriend and now she has somebody of her own. We still talk, trying to be friends, but she wants us to get back together again, and leave the other dude. She claims to love me and I really think she does. But I don't know what to do and more important, I don't know how I feel about her. I know I care about her and miss being with her and spend time together but for some unknown reason that's deeply inside my mind I don't want to get back with her. But it hurts to know that she's with the other guy and I can't stand hearing her talk about him or to him(over the phone). Heck, I can't even stand the thought that he is kissing her and holding her the way I used to. So, my question is...do I really love her? Cause she tells me she loves me and wants me back, I just have to say "I love you too" but I can't. I don't know for sure if I do. Judging by the fact that I miss her and like spending time with her and I hate anyone being close to her I can say I kinda do love her, but then again, why do I feel like this deep inside(wanting to be away from her)? Ok, so here's more details about us...at the beginning of our relationship, she was very...too close to one of my friends(they've been together before me and her) and I was sooooo jealous but they always told me I was paranoid so i had to suppress those feelings and now I can't get them out of my mind. It could be a reason why I don't want her anymore, besides it was me in the first place who broke up with her, in a good moment of our relationship, we didn't have a fight or something. Oh I am so sorry but this story goes so deep and complex and in so many directions that I don't even know what to say anymore, it just hurts so much, I feel that I can't be with her and I can't be without her...and I feel so lonely. What should I do? Go wild and date every girl I meet(it's not my style) or get back with her or stay alone some more...no idea, but I'm afraid of losing her for good. I'm messed up :(
Thanks for reading if you did and I'm not sure what kind of answer do I expect, I just felt a little better writing this down...I'll get back with more posts. ]]> Relationships Danny Boy http://www.womens-health.com/boards/relationships/19701-do-i-love-her.html