Thread: Little bit of family trouble

well, actually quite a lot... all mostly surrounding my older sister. We're all having a hard time coping with her... She doesn't seem to realize that she is causing friction and gets really upset, yells and cries HARD when anyone tries to bring it up to her. There's been a lot of abuse in the family and everyone's been hurt by it to different degrees... Lately, she asked me if I could take her to her therapy appointment the next day. I told her no, I wouldn't be able to because I had some things to take care of that morning when her appointment was scheduled. (just little things that I wanted to do for me, like eat a leisurely breakfast, take a shower, make lunch for college, clean my room.) Everyone in my family knows that I will give and give without any thought for myself and my boyfriend is helping me (on my request) to make time for myself. I made it quite clear that I couldn't take my older sister to her appointment. (Our Mom or brother (older than me; younger than her) could've taken her as well. So the next morning, I got out of bed at 9:24 and my older sister, so very calmly, tells me "We have to leave in 6 minutes." I turned to her and told her I wasn't going to take her. To make a long story short, she basically yelled at me until I gave in. The previous evening her puppies (that she can't train) peed on the floor by my bed and she wiped it up with paper towels. I asked her to get a clorox wipe and sanitize it but she said "No, it's 11 pm. I'm going to sleep." So I did it for her. I don't know what to do about her behavior. Our younger brother is having problems with her as well. She tries to throw her weight around on him and he fights her back. Our Mom has established that there is no 'status' or pecking order in the home, but she still tries to use it. I know that she has been abused, but so has the whole family. I don't understand why she can't get her life in order and help the family out, instead of making excuses... She is 24 and (I feel) thinks she can control her life and make everyone do what she wants them to do. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this?