Oldest of 4, no mother or father.

Aeshma-Deva · 08-16-2009, 11:39 PM

I am the oldest of my siblings and they all seem to be doing great, except for my younger sister who is 16, and seems to know everything about anything right now. She is dating a 24yr old man who is older than I am and he has or is battling a crack addiction. I am almost 97% sure that she is not doing drugs with him, but she is definitely screwing up her entire life. Everytime I try and give her advice, she says that I should just support instead of critize her. I cant do this but she makes me feel as though maybe I am wrong and then Im second guessing myself. I hate feeling this way I tell myself that she will learn and blah blah blah but I really dont know if she ever will. I dont know what I should do... Give up.... let it go... No one cares except for me, and I dont know WHAT TO DO! PLEASE GIVE ADVICE!!! I want to kill him but that wont do anything good. The cops cant do anything either, because shes 16 turning 17.... AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

**Munchkin** · 08-17-2009, 03:10 AM

I've been in this situation with my sister. She got in with the wrong crowd, took drugs, commited a lot of crimes. We tried to help her but the more we did that the worse it made her. In the end she moved away, but i always made sure i knew where she was and how she was doing. In the end she realised what she was doing was wrong and came home. I'm actually not talking to her right now as she threatened my son, and even though she has given up the drugs i still can't forgive her right now. But the main thing is i know she is safe.

My advice would be to stop pushing her, she is a teenager and it is a well known fact, the more you tell them not to do something, the more they will do it!
With the loss of your parents i am sure you are all coping with a lot right now and she is probably angry at the world. You can't force her to come to her senses. So i would suggest you keep a close eye on her but try and give her some time to realise things on her own.

I really hope things work out for you, please keep me updated!

08-16-2009, 11:39 PM	#1
Aeshma-Deva Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 4	Oldest of 4, no mother or father. I am the oldest of my siblings and they all seem to be doing great, except for my younger sister who is 16, and seems to know everything about anything right now. She is dating a 24yr old man who is older than I am and he has or is battling a crack addiction. I am almost 97% sure that she is not doing drugs with him, but she is definitely screwing up her entire life. Everytime I try and give her advice, she says that I should just support instead of critize her. I cant do this but she makes me feel as though maybe I am wrong and then Im second guessing myself. I hate feeling this way I tell myself that she will learn and blah blah blah but I really dont know if she ever will. I dont know what I should do... Give up.... let it go... No one cares except for me, and I dont know WHAT TO DO! PLEASE GIVE ADVICE!!! I want to kill him but that wont do anything good. The cops cant do anything either, because shes 16 turning 17.... AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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08-17-2009, 03:10 AM	#2
Munchkin VIP Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: London Posts: 65	I've been in this situation with my sister. She got in with the wrong crowd, took drugs, commited a lot of crimes. We tried to help her but the more we did that the worse it made her. In the end she moved away, but i always made sure i knew where she was and how she was doing. In the end she realised what she was doing was wrong and came home. I'm actually not talking to her right now as she threatened my son, and even though she has given up the drugs i still can't forgive her right now. But the main thing is i know she is safe. My advice would be to stop pushing her, she is a teenager and it is a well known fact, the more you tell them not to do something, the more they will do it! With the loss of your parents i am sure you are all coping with a lot right now and she is probably angry at the world. You can't force her to come to her senses. So i would suggest you keep a close eye on her but try and give her some time to realise things on her own. I really hope things work out for you, please keep me updated!