Anybody feeling lonely or depressed this holiday season?

**ssda** · 11-24-2009 06:20 AM

I am feeling terrible sometimes. Even though I have a lot to be thankful for, what my sister is doing is making me feel really terrible. She's inviting her friends for thanksgiving and not my family even though we live near by...and we have only each other as family in this side of the globe.
Our relationship is going through a tough time right now but still...and if I invite she'll tell me she has other plans so...
Maybe I am expecting too much. It's like we were in high school she was the popular kid and she didn't want her little sister to embarass her by hanging around her.
If anybody likes to share their story I would like to know it..and hopefully it'll bring some kind of relief for others who might be going through the same thing...

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 12-05-2009 02:36 AM

I personally don't think it has anything to do with you, and I am sorry no one answered before, sometimes threads can get lost, unless people specifically look into family to see that a thread hasn't been replied to.

I think she has a problem with the family, not you.

I think also that she is young, maybe 21? And, wants her mates to drink and have fun, but something is stopping her from creating a couple of hours out of that for the family, it's not you.

So did she leave home?

Wasn't happy? Why?

I truly feel this has nothing to do with you.

CW

**Tropics** · 12-08-2009 10:15 PM

I'm sorry and I know how you feel. Know that you are not alone. There are many of us that have family that have shut us out and the holidays are can be very lonely.

**KMonte85** · 12-09-2009 06:37 AM

I have family problems too that causes me a lot of grief this time of year. But its not so much that I WANT to spend time with the all during the holidays... it is moreso that their backstabbing, passive aggressive comments, disloyalty, and perpetual drama makes me NOT want to see them during the holidays, at least the major offenders....

Have you tried hosting a family get-together and inviting her to spend time with you? How do you know she will decline? If you want to spend more time with your sister, try sending her a lovely Christmas card, telling her how much you love and miss her and if she is too busy to get together over the holidays you would absolutely love it if you could meet up sometime after for coffee and snacks (since you live so close to one another)! Maybe that will work?

**ssda** · 12-16-2009 04:07 PM

CW you have me confused for someone else...regardless Thank you for your replies...
KMonte she's not the kind of person who puts her family (not including her husband and kids) first..they always want to hang with their friends and stuff..
Even if it is inconvenient for her she'll find ways to be there for her friends..but if it's me or our parents she always finds an excuse..
My parents pretend like they believe her excuses..I get really irritated with her behavior..
It's not like they mistreated her or me. We had a wonderful childhood. But she's the type of person who puts her flashy friends first....I know she doesn't have a lot of real good friends...
But whatever...I know she cares for me but to what extent I am not sure...
Sometimes she gets irritated by small things that I or my husband does. Then it's war for her...she says really hurtful things but never apologize for them later...and after long time she acts like nothing happened. Then i don't want to bring it up and sour the relationship again..
I am seeing a pattern now...
Atleast now I am aware of it and hopefully can handle it better next time..
Thanks for your support..
and Happy Holidays to everyone..