I have a problem that my inlaws only call when they need something. My brother in law and his wife are in a partnership with my husband and me on rental property but when it comes to cleaning up a property or paying for things they are no where around. But at income tax time they come running. If he needs help with the farm or sick animals he calls and if she needs a baby sitter she will call. That also goes for his cousin and his wife. But if we need something they already have plans or sometimes they want even call us back. My husband doesn't even care that this happens. I am fed up and they use my daughter also like a baby siter and want pay her when they know she get paid by other for this. I dont want to start trouble but the under currents have affected how I feel toward my husband for letting them do him this way. I resent that they treat him like this and so do my father n law and mother in law. They act like my brother in law is the fair hair child along with his wife and neither are anybetter than us. We never go to them for help but my brother in law does all the time. They actually treat my daughter with distain for everything she does from her after school activities to what she wants to do after she graduates. Telling her that she needs to stay here and not go to college. Most grandparents would want their grandkids to full fill their dreams. ????

The most important aspect is your peace of mind.
There is one way out of this situation.
Dissolve the partnership.
Sell and split the assets.

You can't work with these people.

I have been begging my husband too. He says their trying. My husband works out of town my brother in law works in town. His wife is very controling and if she says jump he says how high. She had never showed any interest except as a tax right off. I spent my mothers day cleaning out rental property why she was having a pedicure, manicure and he took her out to eat. I even watched her child while I was cleaning and she was getting her nails fixed. If I had known it I may have said something but he didn't even have the nerve to tell me he just said she was busy. My husband caught the brunt of it and I told him that I was never going to do it again unless she helps, and that will happen when donkeys fly.

This just get worse and worse.
Really.
Sell the property
use your half to buy something else.

Loralee, I am sorry... but they way things are going it sounds like they already know that they can take advantage of your husband, your daughter and yourself. It is very hard to get out of that pattern when it has been going on for a long time.

They are two solutions for you, If you don't have the backbone to stand up to them.. then sell the property and move away from those leeches. Or, if you can learn to stand up for yourself.. start by saying "NO". Every time they come ask for something..NO. Even if you can do it, even if you have nothing better to do.. even if they want your daughter.. or your husband to do something.. the answer should ALWAYS be "NO". After a long... looooong time of saying NO, and you feel very comfortable saying NO (no cheating, you have to really feel comfortable with the word "NO") you can start saying yes. Once in awhile, never two times in a row. If there is any decency gene in your inlaws DNA.. they will start appreciating you better.

Hey, the worst it can happen, is that they will NEVER ask for anything again.


D.

GIRL....YOU HAVE NO IDEA ......ITS NOT INLAWS THAT CALL WHEN THEY NEED SOMETHING...MY PARENTS TO DO THE SAME THING.