Thread: why is it my family always acts stunned

My father was taken this morning by ambulance to another city that has a center dedicated to complicated heart procedures. He has been in the hospital in the city we reside in for just over a week. My grandmother lives in my parents home. In Fact my parents built on a granny suite to their home and live in that portion with my grandmother and gave the rest of the house to my sister and BIL and her 3 children. My BIL lives in this house he cares for my grandmother. He Cares for my Grandmother and pitches in when needed

My problem was with the choice I was not given the choice I'm in my mid 30's I can make my own choices. I arrived at my parents home at 6am so they could leave and travel to the city my fathers procedure will be in this AM. I did the right thing am i happy about their choice NO - but it is my choices I must live with. They must live with theirs. As I stated before all the matters is that my father makes it thru this procedure. I'll deal with their hurtful behaivor after.

I would have hired a home nurse and/or a babysitter and went to see my father anyways. Sent them the bill, too.
That's ridiculous, what they did - if something bad happened they would be stealing your last moments with your father! Do they think of that?

Little hiring a day nurse would have been a wonderful Idea had I had more time to arrange. It was late lastnight when this was sprung on me. I suggested my BIL look after his kids and my grandmother since he already lives in this house. My mother then became irrate and stated she wasn't discussing this - were her exact words. I then state somthing about I did deserve an answer since all plans were being changed out from under me late in the game. Like I stated this manipulative under handed behavior has happened before with my family. Well my mother and really who is an incredible control freak that demands things go her way. If not then you are some selfish person that does not deserve the time a day. Trust me had things not gone her way once my father recoveres - fingers crossed he makes it - She will no doubt still bad mouth me - she is just that way during stressful times - she doesn't handle it well at all. OMG when my grandfather passed away - i'm the one she unloaded on and again i was at the hospital everyday unlike my sister but she was painted as the saint and me as the ungratful person who did nothing to help our family during a stressful time. I honestly think my mother needs cousiling to resovle issue's in her life.

I'm fine with the person I am and a true believer in what goes around comes around and one day when her lies and imbellishments come to the true light were they belong she will be the foolish selfish person she has tried to pin on me for years. I honestly don't put it past her to tell my father I was to lazy to go and be there with him today.

You are correct in saying that I may be missing out on the last moments I may have with my father - that is why I am so hurt and angry. It was such a manipulative underhanded stunt she pulled. All along I talked about how we were going she had this planned all along. My sister knew too - she had my sister take the last 2 days off from work. It was me they were keeping in the dark. They allowed me to assume whatever till it was too late to make other arrangements for a day nurse to be with my grandmother for the day.