Thread: Family Planning an Intervention

My mother is an alcoholic. She is currently not speaking to any of her family, which includes her parents, her 3 siblings, or me. My sister lives with her along with my stepdad. I have lived with my grandparents for the last 2 years, mainly because her and my relationship is comparable to World War Three.

Her abuse of alcohol has pushed me to extreme limits. Before, I used to think that she could change, all she needed was something to scare her into thinking that her drinking was extremely excessive and abusive. One year while we were camping, she was so drunk that she tripped on the edge of the concrete patio area and fell. As she put her hands out to brace for impact, her one hand went into the fire pit, severely burning on the hot coals. I had to drive her to the emergency room, where she told the nurse she tripped because it was dark, even though she was obviously way past drunk. About a week later we had a family reunion and she had to show up with a bandaged hand. I thought that maybe everyone constantly asking her what happened and her outright lying about it would maybe push her to change. It didn't.

Summer just past, she was outside with the family dog. They have some stairs that lead up to the main door, as the house is a raised bungalow. She drunkenly fell down the stairs and knocked herself out. Luckily my sister got home and found her lying on the ground. She called 911, but by the time paramedics arrived my mom was up and fine. They didn't even take her to the hospital. I thought "Wow, that was a close call, maybe NOW she'll clean up". She didn't.

My mother, when she drinks, becomes verbally and emotionally abusive. She complains about work, about family, and will argue with you that the sky is not blue just for the sake of winning an argument. She has told me that she wishes I were never born, that she never had kids. Also, that I'm a lazy, selfish, ignorant, of a daughter, to name a few. She laid a hand on me once, but I hit her back so hard, that she never again touched me.

Recently, I have caught wind of conversation between my aunt and grandma on the telephone, about planning an intervention for my mother. At this point though, I really don't care. I honestly don't care if my mother drinks herself into a coma, or kills her liver and needs a transplant. Unfortunately, they don't give livers to alcoholics, and she definitely will not get any piece of mine. I don't even think I love my mother. I mean. She is my mother, so there is that kind of love; but as a person, I do not love my mother in any way. I really have given up on her, and if some sort of intervention goes down, I really don't care to be a part of it. I honestly believe there is no changing my mother, and that the only change will come when she dies, however that may be. I am not wishing ill of my mother, or stating that I want her to die. I am just saying, she is dooming herself into serious medical issues that WILL catch up on her.

I'm not even sure why I'm posting this. I really don't care if people think I'm awful for giving up on my mother; if you lived the I lived for the better part of 18 years, you'd have a different perspective.

Is it wrong of me to not want to participate in an intervention? For anyone who has seen that show "Intervention" all the family members write down "You're (insert abused substance here) abuse has affected my life in the following ways...." Honestly, all I could finish that sentence with would be "you ruined my teenage life.". I can't make any threats like "if you do not get help, you will no longer have me in your life" etc. like they do on the show, because I am already not part of her life as it is. I see my mother once every couple of months.