Thread: Problems with younger Sister

I am 46, my sister is 42. She is a HR manager and treats me like an employee. My mom is elderly and in need of some care. My sister lives 5 min away and I live 1.5 hours away. Therefore, my sister resents me because she is doing most of the work. She says mean things to me and leaves me very nasty messages on my phone. Once she told me, "You are useless to me!" Another time she said that "I am a worthless piece of XXX".

She has been bossing me around for my entire life and I am really tired of it. I recently remarried and when I asked her if she would be at my wedding, she responded, "I guess I have no choice."

It is causing me alot of depression, crying and losing sleep over. I want to forget about it, but can't. She makes me feel very guilty. I do the best I can and visit my mother once per week. My mother also has other people to drive her places and friends who come over too.

How can I move on and forgive her?
Thanks.

wow seems like she has some resentment towards you for some reason. Have you tried talking to her? Just a calm, adult conversation, no yelling, no blaming, and no judgement, just get everything on the table. Family is important, if she's your sister you should be able to have a good relationship with her and be good friends with her, especially now since you're both adults. Tell her how you feel, tell her how you would like your relationship to be, and ask her to share what she's feeling and what she wants. If that doesn't work, at least you can say that you were the bigger person in this situation and be satisfied that you gave it an honest shot. Ask her if there is anything you can do to make things right, and if her requests seem unreasonable, explain that to her and tell her why you are unable to do certain things since you live farther away. Is there other things you can do to help your mother without driving there all the time? Maybe help with finances or making appointments for her, or find out about getting her more outside aid? Maybe a visiting nurse a couple times a week? Idk, just some ideas. Good luck.