I was going to email my mother-in-law,googled "mean sisters in law" and ended up here

**NoMoreBS** · 10-22-2010 12:33 AM

I dont think I can take this anymore. My sister in law is just mean, for no reason. We dont see each other very often, but even two weeks/year is way too much to be around this mean, rude, ugly person. We had problems before, my husband asked her sister what I have done for her to treat me badly, and she said that I hadnt done anything. Here is the thing, Im no saint, and I take full responsabilities for my actions, and if I it would have been, in my opinion way better if I had done something, I could say I was sorry and we could move on. But No, I did nothing to her, and even then she was mean to me for 5 days straight.The problem is my mother and father in law protect her, even if she is treating me badly. To be honest, I dont think they really like me, yesterday my mother in law said that my husband has always messed up when it came to gf, and that he could have married his ex because she's rich. They over protect all their kids, but my sister in law is just a spoiled brat. After spending much time by myself or being mistreated during vacations with my husband's family I don't know what to do anymore. I told them that I would not go to their house for christimas and now they are just soooo mad, of course I lied to them and said that I wanted to rest, an we do not have kids, but i told my husband he could go, I dont mind. They are the type of people that wants people to follow them, but I cant do it, so I guess Im not their favorite. She is mean to me, and she's going to stay here for two weeks!!! I dont know what to do, and i dont think anybody has a solution for my problems, but i really needed to vent. and btw, my husband doesnt take side, and keeps saying that all these things do not happened, it's all in my head. I love him, but this is seriously making me upset.

**pretzel** · 10-22-2010 07:52 AM

Unfortunately, your husband has taken sides and it's with his family.

Reread the last part of your post and I think you'll see where I'm coming from.

You'll never get past this without your husband with you.

**sourpuss** · 10-22-2010 08:19 AM

I agree with pretzel, your husband needs to stand up for you.
What kinds of things do they do that are so mean? Can you give us some examples?

**donna88** · 10-22-2010 11:03 AM

Yeah you need to make your husband see that it isn't just in your head otherwise you won't get past this. What sort of things do they say/do? Why can't your husband see them or do you think he deliberately ignores them to make life easier?

**pretzel** · 10-22-2010 11:12 AM

Originally Posted by donna88

Yeah you need to make your husband see that it isn't just in your head otherwise you won't get past this. What sort of things do they say/do? Why can't your husband see them or do you think he deliberately ignores them to make life easier?

the latter

**tomato** · 10-26-2010 08:30 AM

I think the best thing to do is not get upset about this. Hate will only breed more hate. So you don't have to agree with his family, as long as you are nice to them they will have nothing to be upset about. If you let them make you upset, it will only make them want to make you more upset. The best way to diffuse any situation is being nice to people, even though they have done nothing to deserve it. This shows people that you are a stronger person than them and I guaranty this will make them at least respect you and leave you alone hopefully.

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I am a mom of 2 wonderful boys. I protect my family with helpful parents and the love of Jesus Christ.

**MPearson** · 10-26-2010 11:00 PM

Hi just joined and read your mean sister law i can relate and it seems as if we have the same family sometimes it is best to cut losses than have to try and please everyone in the end you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of others be a peace with your decision it is there loss, unfortunately sacrafices have to be made.

**Lunar Keiki** · 10-27-2010 12:34 PM

I really don't understand why you would lie as to the reason why you are not going. I would be straight up with my husband and tell him that until he supports you and has your back, you are no longer going to submit yourself to such abuse. Why should you? And if my in laws questioned me directly, I would tell them the same thing--"Why do you want me to go so that your daughter can abuse my verbally and emotionally? Since when did I turn into a doormat? Oh, you can't see it? Well, I can and I won't tolerate it. Happy holidays--I am sure you all will enjoy it much better without me there." Why do in laws always feel that they have carte blanche on treating daughter in laws like they are the bottom of the food chain?