Sperm donor
So my father and I have had a rocky relationship. I've forgiven him time and time again for the things his done like going in and out of jail for various reasons. He's even smoked crack/cocaine while I've been at his house.
After all the ways he has hurt me, I've forgiven him. The last time, it was me announcing my engagement and him walking me down the aisle. Now, I don't hear from him anymore. He's slowly stopped talking to me and it seems to stem from me not being able to be his personal taxi.
I feel guilty not forgiving him but I can only forgive him so many times. Am I wrong for not letting him walk me down the aisle? Does it seem childish? I'd prefer my big brother and my baby brother do it. They've been here for me more and have hurt me in far less critical ways.
It's your wedding, your vows. You do what feels right for you.
You do know, you are an independent woman, willingly joining in partnership with the man of your choosing? You aren't a commodity to be handed over to a new male owner. You don't have to have anyone "give" you away.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
They aren't giving me away, just walking me down the aisle. I wanted to include them and this is the one way I thought would be appropriate.
But yes it is my wedding you are right.I just don't like to hurt someone's feelings no matter how many times they have hurt mine.
You are a very caring and loving young woman, someone must have done something right as you were growing up! Having your caring brothers on either side of you sounds like very good way to include them or often times the bride's brothers act as groomsmen.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
Yeah that was the initial plan. We're maxed out on the bridal party, though. Half the guests will be at the alter it seems! But thank you for the compliments.
I think having your brothers walk you down the aisle will be a lovely gesture. There is no rule that your father must walk with you, heck, there's no rule that you need to walk with anybody. You could dance the hokey pokey down that aisle on your own if you wanted to...
I'm sure your brothers would be honored to walk you down the aisle on your wedding day. And if you think this would feel more "right" than to walk with your father, then that is what you do.
Whatever makes you happy, whatever has the most meaning to you and your fiance on that day, is what you should do.
Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Posting Permissions
LinkBack URL
About LinkBacks
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks