Thread: My Father Jumped on me and my mom...

Wow... hey CG! Good to see you... I thought we may have scared you away with our "tough love". Glad to hear you are ok and you're working things out. So what's the plan now?

PS- of course we don't think you're crazy, we're just trying to help you head in the right direction.

I admire you and your mother. Keep working to do your best at school. If you need to, get a part-time job to help support yourself. Talk to your counselor at school and the financial aid office to see if there are any grants/scholarships you can apply for, and apply for all of them. If they require an essay, go to the writer's lab (there's probably one affiliated with your English Department), or find a good writing instructor to help critique your essays and then submit them and see if you can't get some more money to help you get through college. Also, if you have access to a computer, check with Southern Miss. and see if there are online classes you can take that will transfer and meet your requirements, or if they have some online classes that you could take while you're still at your community college. My nephew completed his four-year degree in two and a half years by supplementing his regular curriculum with online classes at the school he attended (in your case, try and get some at Southern Miss).

Perhaps, your mom will want to come with you when you're ready to go to school at Southern Miss. I think you should call the police the minute any abuse begins. Let it be documented. If he wants to get abusive, he can spend the night in jail.

In the meantime, don't put yourself in a position of antagonism with your dad. Keep your head down and concentrate on your studies and how you can make things better for yourself and perhaps, even your mother. You don't need to put you and your mother at risk by confronting him. He won't listen, anyway.

My husband built the largest chain of women's self defense schools on the West Coast while he went to chiropractic school. Almost all of his students had been abused. In every single instance, the women admitted they had pushed the guy's buttons. If you haven't been trained in martial arts and have the skill and ability to defend yourself, don't get in his face. Don't jump in the middle of any arguments. Don't let him get under your skin when he spouts off. Let it go. You don't respect his opinion; so don't let him get to you; don't let him bait you. Stay strong and motivated to get yourself out of there as quickly as you can. If he gets obnoxious, ignore it. If he gets in your face, stay impassive. If he raises a hand to you or anyone else in the house, call the police immediately -- every time. Go to church with your mom. Say family prayers. Read the scriptures together. You may think you don't have time, or that this is unrelated to what you need. It will give you strength. Your faith will increase; your confusion will dissipate and you'll get answers.

Best wishes!