Hi Everyone.

I am 19 years old and have a very small vaginal opening...I don't know the correct word if there is one, but I can just use regular size tampons...jumbo sized won't fit so I obviously cannot have sex yet. This is very frustrating for me and I was wondering if using regular vaginal dilators I have researched on the Internet (used mostly for something else called vaginismus....spasms?) will work. I think it's just a matter of having an abnormally tight opening. My friends have all said "oh just keep trying, it should stretch out" but I have tried everything and come to find it's just... small.

Does anyone think these will work, or have had a similar problem?

So you are still a virgin? What makes you think it's too small? Have you tried to have sex and just couldn't get it in or are you just basing this off of your own private experimenting?

If you are still a virgin, keep in mind that women are always tight for their first few times or so. It is so tight that it is uncomfortable for many women when first inserting the penis. It hurts many women due to the stretching. That is all very normal and is just something you have to work through.

Also remember that if you penetrate yourself with things, you may lose your virginity without ever having a man inside you. The first man you are with will likely take pride in being the one to take your virginity. Men know to expect virgins to be extra tight so he should not be surprised. It takes time and patience to work the penis in and many people have to try multiple times before they can get it all the way in.

If you still want to make it wider, then the best way to do that is by masterbating regularly with penis-like vibrators. Start out with something that fits nicely and buy new vibrators which gradually increase in size. The vaginal opening will start to open up. However, you have to keep up the masterbation or start having sex because when women go long periods without sex, the vagina has been known to shrink back up either slightly or back to it's original size.

Hello!

I am 47 years old and I too have a small vaginal opening. I have a "different" history that I have found that if you were in my shoes....you might understand.

I was a virgin until age 30......I married a guy that was wide hipped and a little over-weight. We found that our first time was a little disappointing (for me at least...he didn't complain)...we continued to have "sex" as he put it but I was left wondering what the big deal was.

He would always complain that "it fell out" and would say I am too fat AND/OR my legs were not spread enough.....because he was wide hipped.

To make a long story short I will just say I am divorcing him after 16 years of "marriage" (even though we have been separated for the last 9 years AND he has been living somewhere else and seeing me on the weekends until 2/14/08). I have found a new man that I have fallen in love with...and I have found his "anatomy" to be a bit too large in length and diameter. We have tried to make love but he says it seems VERY tight.....and I experience pain while he tries to "force" his way in. He has NEVER been able to get in over an inch inside me....and has not been able to get beyond my vaginal opening. This has caused me to see a Doctor.

My Doctor did a pap smear, an examination (including her finger) and concluded I was not very deep nor can my vaginal opening be expanded to accommodate his LENGTH and diameter without grinding the bone on my vaginal opening. Naturally one of my Doctor's questions was if I ever had bore any children...and I have not, she said I was so small in the first place that if I were to ever gotten pregnant I could not have a child naturally without surgery.

My Doctor wants me to see a gynocoligest to see if I have any options. The only option my Doctor sees is grinding my cartelige off within my vagina. Needless to say this sound painful and not my first choice...Health insurance coverage issues are also a MAJOR factor due to the nature of the surgery.

Therefore, my question is for anyone out there is....IS THERE ANYONE ELSE WHO HAS HAD THIS PROBLEM AND MIGHT HAVE ANOTHER OPTION FOR ME? I love love this guy and I want us to be happy together...he says he loves me no matter what BUT I suspect he may try to get it from his "EX" or somewhere else. I trust him BUT as I have been told this sort of thing is all men think about. HE has desire and I desire him but I need help.

PLEASE REPLY ASAP

Sharon

Hi Sharon - YEP ive had the same problem ...but its not really a problem .

Ive had close to 100 plus vaginal examinations in the last 2 years or so in fact its got to be coming close to 150 more like.

The thing is , if i can explain ...its not a physical problem . I just havent had any kids and a lot of women are smaller and tighter . I havent lived with anybody yet ...im a fussy woman but what i mean is i havent had regular sex as a couple would be doing living together . It good really as just talking about living here i know most of my friends who have had kids or been married since 22 by age 23 they were not having sex or bored of it ..but for me i dont take the pill im physically fir and active and just a smallish slim person anyway .

I had lots of boyfriends as most women do from when they were young , some didnt live in this country , they lived abroad were we met , but i never married those guys i dated them, it never got to the point of sleeping together .

I was 36 when i met somebody i fell in love with (unusual for me , coz i dont fall in love too easily ) unfortunately we couldnt be together in the end, i spoke about him in another post . It wasnt painful but it was very tight but it takes a little time to get it in , he was experienced coz he was about 45 if he told me the truth (you know men ) and it continued to be tight ...but i had no problems and i know he had no complaints i think he preferred it like that . The next boyfriend also didnt live here but we met here he was 25 and he was quite big downthere we were together for 2 weeks ...but you know he was a little bit too immature , he was just young ...but it was also tight ....

I had a few problems after that - i had to go into hospital for - but they got sorted out but it wasnt because of the size of my vagina , unfortunately even though i just started out so to speak - my first boyfriend that i was together with had given me a problem - you know an STI - it wasnt serious , it was chlymydia - but wasnt very truthful and it tuned into Pelvic Infection - which made me quite sick - fine now it was a couple of years ago. It was difficult for them to examine me because naturally the sex thing was all newish so i had to have lots of vaginal examinations which were really painful ...lot of the times theyd just say your small down there , but you know im a small person and my hips arent wide so there has to be lots of women like that plus more difficult because i hadnt had a baby . Also ive never used any sex toys , ive got no interest in pieces of plastic or rubber - i just think its sad , its no substitute for real skin or somebody your really really attracted to , so i havent used them in my life ..and also dont use tampons - i did for a bit in high school but they were only the mini tiny ones .

My last boyfriend was a bit younger 28 , we didnt stay together but it was good for me to be with him for a little bit beause it helped me get over my bad experience of the times i had the examinations - i think i did very well to get over it , i hope that dosent sound like boasting because it was a frightening experience and being touched andexamined all those times in the hospital ect - i didnt need therapy for the pain they gave me , but i felt i was strong enough to get through it but upset about the things i found out about they guy i loved , evn what he did to me !! so this guy was 26 and we did make love but of course with a condom and it must of been ok because we used 6 condoms in one night but younger guys are are a little more energetic arent they.. he was gentle but it was still tight quite tight but fine ...it must of been to do it for the six times ...or till about 11.00 the next day on and off .

The thing is in my experience and from the guys i date , they dont want a woman whos slept with lots of men so i dont know why a woman would be wanting to stretch the vagina , they can tell if you slept around and they dont like it , and i wouldnt like to be that way , im happy with my body so you should be proud and happy about your body...jsut go with the way you feel and how you want to be .

I go on dates but , i dont want to sleep with all the dates you have to feel something special , sometimes you date and you thing no, we dont have anything in common ect ...so it would be madness to sleep with someone .

The vagina does not shrink or dry up ..i spent enough time in hospital and the maternity unit here in my country when i was in hospital , ive spoken to many many drs private and national health ...nothing drys up or shrivels , its old wives tale...My periods are normal every 28 days at the same time in the evening and i have the same amount of the normal womanly fluids as i did all my life , no changes .

We are smaller because we havent had children and in my case not that much sex adnalso because we have been told we are smaller and tighter i think perhaps i dont know the more sex you have perhaps it does stretch a little but mine hasnt changed and yours hasnt so i dont think we need to worry about this . Only if you want to palce something in your vagina but i wouldnt - id wait till you meet someone you love and just use a little lubrication NOT because you are dry i dont have that problem but just to help guid the man inside so it dosent hurt as much.

Im quite happy with how i am but i do know giving birth would hut a little ...but i dont know how thye go about that perhaps theyd do a C section and then if i was married id still feel the same for a husband which is good ... I think you should relax and dont worry .

Best regards Catherine x

I am 26 and married for 2.5 yrs. I am very distressed due to my small/almost no vaginal opening. I underwent a surgery recently to remove my hymen, as it was very tight and not allowing my husband to have intercourse with me. But, after the surgery, my doctor has advised me to use 'vaginal dilators' to expand the vaginal opening. I am somehow not happy with that option, i don't like to do all that. I never used tampons. I am very tensed because this may also be a reason for my unhappy marriage. Sometimes I lose hope and I think I should let my husband go. I really don't know how successful I will be with use of dilators. Anyone has any experience with dilators or any better option that i can use?

I wish I could offer you some words of advice or suggestions...I guess the only thing I can say is make sure he is patient, take your time and use plenty of lubrication.

I am somewhat the polar opposite. My vaginal opening is not what I would call stretched...but it is "open". No matter if I am turned on or being intimate with my hubby or not...it doesn't permanently close. I've had 2 children but it was "open" before ever giving birth. I know that my vagina has adapted to enable my hubby to penetrate me. My hubby is well endowed ( over 9" ) and I have no problem or discomfort with him penetrating me. I wouldn't call myself "loose"...I prefer to say that I am made for my hubby and is size.