Thread: my fiance is addicted to porn and i'm so lost

Originally Posted by awcmon

Well I'm not sure what either of you mean by moralistic. If you mean that they may morally decide that porn violates their sense of morality - that is, what's right/wrong - then maybe.

But just so I understand -

Are you really suggesting that any woman who opposes must be a prude, insecure, or jealous?? Is that really your stance?

I believe, "as a woman" I have a good understanding on how the majority of women feel, think when it comes to their man.... I am suggesting, that some of those are the issues yes, suggesting and stating some.

I'd have to say that's extremely judgmental & narrow-minded -

Well that is your opinion... however, your basing it on 1 paragraph, I could turn around and say is that how you judge people? But, that to me would be judging...

And Married - sorry to burst this bubble. We can disagree on whether or not we would tolerate porn -

But men absolutely desire the women they look at in pornography. If they aren't desirable to them - they don't look. There's a reason people look at one picture/video/site over another - because they desire what they find there.


I'm not sure what you're trying to convince me of here. You do get that I am not suggesting your husband doesn't desire you, right? I haven't said there's anything wrong with you & your husband watching porn.

Just clarifying that what's okay for you isn't the rule by which all rational women must live.

The suggestion that all women who oppose porn in their marriages are either prudish, insecure, or jealous is very short-sighted.

Just to clarify, again..... Married15 did not make that comment.

And, I believe that I have answered that.

Perhaps those who are afraid to confront their husband's use of porn & make a clear stance on what they will accept are sheltering some insecurities.

Have a read at various threads here, seeing as you are new....

I can't recall one woman whom has not made it very clear, on what she will or won't accept from their S/0 and have confronted them... Certainly, most, that are up-set about porn within a relationship, didn't know upon entering the relationship as the S/0 did not tell them.


Porn is indeed the problem for couples in which one partner does not want the other to watch it. Until you step outside & recognize that there are women who feel differently than you do, you will have a very limited ability to understand how this issue impacts many women.

I believe that you may wish to review Married15's comments there as well pertaining to that last statement. She has stated and I highlighted clearly, very clearly that she as a woman understands that "all" feel differently about Porn.

I also think, as a woman, we, as women have various friends of the same sex, we all talk and therefore, our knowledge is really not limited at all..

And, as a women, certainly we understand the inpact of "pain and hurt"...


Hope that clarifies my thoughts on the matter, as "my opinions", relating to what you have specifically asked me.

I am sure you have some very valid points and it appears you do but as I stated:-

It is a topic that will be different to all, on how they view.

CW