cheating, depressed husband

**bekcheff** · 06-06-2009 08:45 PM

My husband has cheated ( emotionally ) with his ex who lives out of state.Since this time he has moved out and I have noticed that he is depressed.
I have talked to him about this....he also has really bad anxiety and it is getting worse day by day. He is going to go to a doctor....but in the mean time he is pushing me away.
I know this is because of his depression, but I am wondering if anyone has any advice on how to support him, when he refuses to see me or talk to me....he says he wants to stay married and that he just needs to get help......AHHH it's so frustrating to want to help but it is so hard when he keeps pushing me away

Should I leave him alone and let him call me??? ( I don't want him to feel abandonded)

or should I keep callling and telling him that I love him???

**WildChild** · 06-06-2009 10:27 PM

Maybe an a card or two or three a week? Some funny, some caring - just to let him know you are thinking of him but respecting he current need for time alone? This must be very difficult, I hope you have a good support group.
In addition to the doctor, is he seeing a counselor?

**jstew86** · 06-11-2009 06:18 AM

I think WildChild had a great idea with sending him cards through the mail. If you continue to call and come by this may make him have foul feelings toward you for not respecting his wishes. Try to do as he says. You can text him once in a while (1 every 2 weeks - unless he texts you) and perhaps email him just to check on him once in a while. Try not to bring up the depression and the cheating... he already knows and i'm sure he always feels like its killing him inside. Stay positive for him!!

**HALFNOTHING** · 06-12-2009 11:59 PM

You can't help a person when even himself can't help his self..

he says he wants to stay married and that he just needs to get help

hahaha..funny.. help? what he thinks? is he understand your situation in this? after done cheating and he's begging for help and support? it's unfair to you.. this is absolutely abusive husband.. he wants you to understand him but yet is he even hesitate to understand you?

like, you're playing with shadow..