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Originally Posted by mellaya78
It has been my experience that when you start having signs and getting bad feelings, your instinct is usually right. I have been cheated on several times and know there are a lot of signs and usually women do not become suspicious unless there is a good reason. Of course, some women have been cheated on so much that they begin this habitual pattern of suspicion and doubt so just make sure that is not what you are doing.
Anyway, men like to turn things around by making comments that they are fat or unattractive or whatever to create misdirection. The same thing is happening when guys will start accusing YOU of cheating. It is an attempt to misdirect the focus onto you. Guys that are cheating tend to become less attentive and more stand-offish. Also more irritable and short tempered with you. Be aware, a woman's intuition is a powerful thing and is often times ignored. Women can unconsciously pick up on changes in attitude and behavior which triggers that intuitive feeling.
I picked up a little trick in my experience. I have found that if I come right out and say "I KNOW you have cheated on me!"... instead of "well.... I... feel like you are cheating on me." or "I am... well... worried... that you are cheating on me."... then they feel like they have been caught, you truly know what you are talking about, and often times will break down and admit it. If a cheating man senses weakness in what you are saying, then he is going to take every advantage to convince you that you are completely wrong.
I say, life is too **** short to be in a relationship without trust. If you can't get things worked out to where you trust each other again then you might as well move on to someone that will not make you feel that way.
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I am rather scared. My current bf has been talking to a girl named 'Kelly' but he insists he has done nothing. I asked his sister and she said 'Oh she has a Man' but I asked him and he said she didn't. NOW he is out and it is 2:10AM, his sister called asking for him but I told her he was out than saying oh well hes not here and not at his other sisters and his mothers...
I am rather scared b/c what you said sounds like my situation right now. He HAS turned it back on me and I have asked in that ways but I did openly ask him up front if he did and he said no. BUT I do have a weird feeling but this is my FIRST relationship and I have NO idea on what the feeling is.
I am very nervous like his sister is covering it up and telling me "Without trust there is nothing" and "Well I never seen him cheat on you" and "well leave him" THEN turning around and asking him HOW I found this out, and insiting HE get his own MSN so I cant see what he is saying... Is it wrong I want to know?? He has made me feel bad about spying but I think IF there is NOTHING to hide than why mind me looking... I dunnoooo....