Heart Broken Is he cheating or what.

**TURKEY BLOOSOM** · 06-26-2009 01:45 PM

Ifound out the other day that my husbond of 16 y registerd for a singles personal web site.Why would a married man do this.You see adout the sometime he started acting differnt I ask him if he was haveing an afear with a lady from work in march cause i read an email that said see ya later QT.Well I do beleave it wasnt her but I still think he was or still is.He went from not beeing adle to keep his hands off me to not touching me a all.Had him go to DR.every thing was fine.But still says he never cheated on me.Any input would be helpfull we are or was high school sweet hearts.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 06-26-2009 03:55 PM

See if you "found out about the site and the email" then you were looking for evidence in that belief, that he is/was/is.

It's evident that there is un-happiness or he wouldn't be ignoring you or searching for love, romance, you say you had sex before 24/7 now not, so it's got to be more that he's searching for.

Ask yourself, what went wrong, what's missing for you as well, not just him, sometimes it all fades to friendship, if one person gives up and lets it go.

People think it's easy to maintain love it's not...

The email doesn't say anything wrong in my opinion, chatting is obviously something he is trying to develop, perhaps that's what is missing, the intimacy of involvement of his life.

CW

**HALFNOTHING** · 06-27-2009 04:53 AM

agreed with mom..
Try not to think that way.. you may accusing of nonsense and that's not good on his part. seriously, chatting is not a big issue for me. People tend to chat when they feel out of place and unhappy.. try to be romantic.. do things that you feel it's missing.. after all, all you feel are only suspicious. not a big deal when there's no proofs..

have you been in a fight before that would lead him act like that? ask your self honestly..

**solders_nvr_die** · 06-28-2009 12:55 AM

if he has cheated its hard but leave em but if he is just tlking then he probly has low self esteem guys might tlk to other females to see if he is still atractive im not to sure how old he is but i felt that after my wife kinda shut off the romance stuff and so i had myspace girls i never had intent to sleep around on her but i did get the feeling i was wanted by other girls made me feel better so im not sure if u tell him he is hot or cute as but if u dnt cld be a reason their but if he is cheating then leave u will only hurt ur self by staying

**dr.mansview** · 06-28-2009 01:16 AM

s.n.d. is probably right..looking for an ego boost..

**yellowpiXi3** · 06-28-2009 12:40 PM

Originally Posted by dr.mansview

s.n.d. is probably right..looking for an ego boost..

but WHY?! is it really the attention?

**WildChild** · 06-28-2009 02:05 PM

People can justify it any way they want but someone who is married has no business on a singles site. Period.
You can consider it a wake up call, start talking and see what the two of you can do to strengthen your marriage or kick him out.
Really, what's he going to do there? Engange in philosophical discussions?
(I'm in a mood today - sorry if this is overly blunt)
Talk to him! Ask him just what he is looking for there? He made a commitment, so did you. Are the two of you taking each other for granted? Can you spice things up? Can this be the catalyst to improve your marriage or is it the warning bell? Only you can determine that.

**stressed** · 06-30-2009 05:16 PM

Originally Posted by WildChild

People can justify it any way they want but someone who is married has no business on a singles site. Period.
You can consider it a wake up call, start talking and see what the two of you can do to strengthen your marriage or kick him out.
Really, what's he going to do there? Engange in philosophical discussions?
(I'm in a mood today - sorry if this is overly blunt)
Talk to him! Ask him just what he is looking for there? He made a commitment, so did you. Are the two of you taking each other for granted? Can you spice things up? Can this be the catalyst to improve your marriage or is it the warning bell? Only you can determine that.

I agree with this. Dating websites are for people who look for a date, not married people. If he lacks something he must talk to you about it, not look for it in someone else. And chat? Why? Is it easier and more convenient to type your thoughts to a person you imagine how it is than talk with the person you love and live with? You have to stop this soon before it becomes an addiction.

**dr.mansview** · 06-30-2009 05:39 PM

i wasn't trying to justify his actions..WC,and stressed are correct..it is not right to do that..just saying that after 16 years of marriage perhaps he is in a rut and in his mind this is his ego boost..and "yellow", yes it could indeed be an ego thing altho a singles dating site may lead to disaster..however since "turkey blossom" has seen other suspicious behaviour, there indeed could be more to it..

**caterpillar79** · 06-30-2009 08:35 PM

It depends on his REAL sexual orientation...maybe he is curious to swing? Heck...whatever. Married people have no business in dating sites unless they BOTH consent (swinging), even with people who are attached (BF) it still is a NO-NO for me. Once you commited to a partner, you shouldn't waste your time and energy outside of that union. You should only focus it in the relationship and make sure it blossoms.

Talk to him, sit him down (as usual...). Set up ground rules so the playing field is fair for both of you. But be reminded that when you truly love, you don't expect anything in return (easier said than done - i know).