Thread: What is wrong with us?

I have sat here and wondered what was wrong with me? Why is it that my husband does the things that make me mad, scream, and then cry? Then we complain to our friends or family, and even strangers. Anyone who will listen cause our husband wont listen or change. But eventually they do talk to us. And makes us feel somehow better. Nothing has changed, nothing will change. And suddenly we are back to the beginning. Is it us? Is it them? Does it mean that we are not compatible together? Does it mean that we will never be happy? Im not saying that all marriages are like that. I just want to know why do we go back. I want to know how to stop the cycle. Why do all the movies and books the men seam to realize the problem then magically change? We know that people dont magically change. We watch it on Maury. The cheating husbands, the abusive husband, the neglectful husband never changes. They go back to the same person. And so do we. But unfortunately we are not perfect either. We are just as capable of hurting them as they are. And even some do. But why do people do that to the one they supposedly loved? How can we look into their sad hurt painfilled face and do that again? But then again we (people) have been doing it for centuries. And not just with the ones we loved but with complete strangers too. Countless battles, wars, deceit. And now that we have broke into technology it gets even easier to hurt others. So did God (pardon me for any insults to choice of religion) make a mistake. We were created by him. For what, amusement? If I was looking down I would laugh at the stupidity. Its like watching a dog trying to get into a hole that a rabbit jump into that is too small for the dog. Even though the dog already tried, he keeps tryin. Do we ever break the cycle? Even if we left the ones who hurt us, isnt there just as much pain outside our homes as there is in? I dont mean to bring people down with me. Not all of us are bad. Some of us are the best we could be. The best we will ever be. And even some might change. But for now we have to live in our worlds and try not to be broken. To all of those people who are hurt, Im sorry. Even if you never hear it from the ones we cant get away from. Know that someone out there knows the pain. And that person is truely sincere about their apology. None of us knew what we signed on for when you were born. I think if we did, we would of said no thanks. I dont need any advice on this thread. I just wanted to say that its pretty messed up that we keep going back to get hurt. That I keep going back to the same cycle where eventually I break down to tears. Thank you for just reading this. And maybe if we pray real hard somehow we will find the strength to cut the rope. Find a new way into that D hole. Cause the one we keep tryin is just not workin.


THANK YOU AND IM SORRY FOR YOU PAIN AGAIN

Nothing is wrong with you its pure human nature, at some degree even in the middle of the cycle you see hope you see light at the end of the tunnel and you head for it even if it does lead you back down the same rabbit hole.
I tend to think that our insecurites all play a big part and I know myself that if you think negatively you tend to take a negative action, this is part of a cylce but part of being conditioned centuries over, if no human had any hope or seen any light at any time none of us would ever try. We may remain in the cycle but we have a glance and we go for it, simple fact is that all of our lives require some sort of effort in relationships with friends and with family. We may feel like we are banging our heads against brick walls but to a degree alot of us are conditoned to keep trying because thats what we were taught.
If none of us had ever learnt how it felt to be hurt to have something taken away from us to be mistreated in any way how would you ever know that you had been? Sometimes yes life would be great living in an ignorant bliss which I must say im sure some people chose to live in but at some time the wall breaks down and you get a glimpse of reality I guess, and most people will work, they will try to forgive and they will fight for what they think is right or because they are scared of what they dont know and the cycle begins again.
The cycle stops when you can change the way you think and then every now and then you will still find yourself back in it. I know every now and then I still hit the wall to a degree, but its in me to pick up and carry on thats what I do I put things in my past, sure they come up again from time to time but hopeless dork is right it starts with how your willing to be treated, but changing that and seeing that you can change that takes practise and takes a lot of time and for you to see the good in you takes time and still at times you lose it for a little but its all part of life.
Have I been hurt? Yes I have endured alot of pain from a lot of different points in my life, have I hurt others? I am sure I have not always intentionally but I know i have. Have I broken the cycle? I like to think so but at the same time I still need to think about it in order not to fall back into it and not to be self destructive and negative and that is my hardest part!